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Showing posts with label Wedding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Wedding. Show all posts

Sunday, October 2, 2011

What's Your Number?

Q: What’s the movie about?

A:  When a girl (Anna Faris) finds out that the number of men she's slept with is considered high, she decides to go back through her ex's and try to marry one of them rather than sleeping with yet another guy.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A:  Anna Faris, Chris Evans, Ari Graynor, Blythe Danner, Ed Begley Jr., Dave Annable, Oliver Jackson-Cohen, Heather Burns, Eliza Coupe, Kate Simses, Tika Sumpter, Joel McHale, Jacquelyn Doucette, Chris Pratt, Denise Vasi, Zachary Quinto, Mike Vogel, Martin Freeman, Andy Samberg, Thomas Lennon, Anthony Mackie, Ivana Milicevic, Aziz Ansari

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A:  PhotobucketProceed with Caution.  There are a lot of "cute" moments, but they are surrounded by lines that are too cheesy or plot points that are too unbelievable, so you never buy into the premise completely.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A:  Aside from a few shots of unnecessary nudity, you can't help but wonder why they decided to make this cutesy rom-com rated "R."  That said, the few truly funny jokes do fit into the "R" category, they just don't fit into the rest of the script.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: In regards to this, my number is zero.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A:  In this category it will also remain a virgin.

Q: How is the Acting?

A:  Anna Faris is at her best when she gets to do really broad, over the top comedy.  She doesn't get to do a lot of that here.

Q: How is the Directing?

A:  Anna Faris doesn't look pretty in 90% of the film.  Rather than blame the fact that she's not aging well, I'm gonna blame the director for not looking out.  But only because there were so many other things that bugged me about his work, like rack focus shots that forgot to rack, and other such instances of random blurriness.

Q: How is the story/script?

A:  The two writers Gabrielle Allan & Jennifer Crittenden come from the very top of TV...  Jennifer Crittenden has written for Arrested Development, The Simpsons, and Seinfeld (to name a few impressive shows), and Gabrielle Allan is a name I'm familiar with because, not only did she write for Scrubs, but she wrote pretty much every episode that was good enough to get me to look up who the writer was for that episode... But somehow, in this case, their talent doesn't translate all that strongly to film.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: What's Your Number? Trailer

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Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Zookeeper


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A zookeeper (Kevin James) finds out that the animals can talk, when they try to reunite him with the woman who broke his heart (Leslie Bibb).

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Kevin James, Rosario Dawson, Leslie Bibb, Ken Jeong, Donnie Wahlberg, Joe Rogan, Nat Faxon, Steffiana De La Cruz, Nick Turturro, Brandon Keener, and the voices of: Nick Nolte, Adam Sandler, Sylvester Stallone, Cher, Judd Apatow, Jon Favreau, Faizon Love, Maya Rudolph, Bas Rutten, Don Rickles, Jim Breuer

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. Here's what happened to me... I tried to take my almost 3 year old niece to see the movie with talking cars, but the Arclight didn't let us in because they were more than 10 minutes into the previews. She was disappointed, so I agreed to take her to the movie with talking animals instead. Turns out that talking animals are really scary to an almost 3 year old-- especially when voiced by the dulcet tones of Nick Nolte, Sylvester Stallone, and Faizon Love. So we left after 20 minutes. Unfortunately for me, the first 20 minutes were really promising, so I went back the next day to see the rest.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: A few times in the first 20 minutes. Less when I found out what the ride I was on was really gonna be like.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: It made my niece cry.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Best Beastiality Scene in a PG movie. (Thanks to the beautiful and charming Katrina Begin of Minnesota.)

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Kevin James is great. I know, I really just said that. But the voice cast is a-nnoy-ing! Especially Maya Rudolf as the giraffe. She's lucky she's in Bridesmaids, because otherwise, this could've marked the beginning of a dry spell for her. And why did Judd Apatow suddenly decide he needed to add acting to his resume? Isn't he busy enough?

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Seeing it a second time, I realized that it was the lighting and the score that were scaring my niece almost as much as the deep voiced lions, bears, and gorilla. But I think the fact that I had to explain to her several times that it was supposed to "funny" not "scary" kind of says it all.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Well it has 5 writers, so you know how that goes. But at least they got a T.G.I.Fridays promotion in there, so everyone could get paid and laugh all the way to the bank! Honestly, it's not that bad if you like movies that are completely predictable in every way.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: A Gorilla in T.G.I.Fridays is totally disturbing even if he does speak English and wear a shirt. Speaking of which, whatever happened to "No shoes, no shirt, no service"? Dude isn't even wearing pants!

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: Zookeeper Trailer

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Thursday, May 26, 2011

The Hangover Part II


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Another night that no one can remember, ends in Stu (Ed Helms) getting a face deformation, Phil (Bradley Cooper) getting an arm injury, and Alan (Zach Galifianikis) getting a baby-- only this time his baby is a monkey.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, Zach Galifianikis, Ken Jeong, Mason Lee, Justin Bartha, Jamie Chung, Paul Giamatti, Sasha Barrese, Jeffrey Tambor, Mike Tyson, Gillian Vigman, Aroon Seeboonruang, Yasmin Lee

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketGo! If you want to see another Hangover, you'll get what you came for. But, since you've seen one before, everything that was fresh and original about the first one is gone, and even the surprises won't be that surprising.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: As with the last one, the hardest laughs are in the slideshow at the end... And also, the monkey does have a banana on his hat.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: That depends on how you feel about chicks with dicks. Hey, you were warned by the fact that this takes place in Bangkok.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: This gets the prize for Consistency. Whatever they did last time, they found a new way to do it all again.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Sometimes, when I stare into Bradley Cooper's steel blue eyes, or I catch a glimpse of his red-lipped, toothy smile, I can't help but wonder... why has he never played a vampire? Separately, I'd like to note that from now on, when someone tries to insult what I'm doing by telling me, "A monkey could do it," I'm going to assume they're talking about the monkey in this movie, and be flattered.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The first half is really slow and predictable. It even gave me time to wonder who could possibly be the one to get married in The Hangover Part III. I don't think Bradley Cooper can, because he's such a dick that his only redeeming quality is his marital status. Ed Helms is already on his second-- although they gave him a lot of good reasons to get dumped in the plot of this one. And Zach Galifianakis is pretty much undateable.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: They take everything so far in this one that you almost feel like you can't come back from it. And actually, their attempt to do so is passable at best.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: The Hangover Part II Trailer

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Thursday, May 12, 2011

Bridesmaids


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A lonely, single woman (Kristen Wiig) is asked to be the maid of honor in her childhood best friend’s (Maya Rudolf) wedding. It’s all good until her childhood best friend’s new best friend (Rose Byrne) tries to usurp the lead role in every aspect of the wedding and the friendship.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolf, Rose Byrne, Chris O’Dowd, Melissa McCarthy, Wendi McLendon-Covey, Ellie Kemper, Jon Hamm, Jill Clayburgh, Matt Lucas, Rebel Wilson, Michael Hitchcock, Kali Hawk, Annie Mumolo, Ben Falcone

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketGo! F-U. Chicks are funny!

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Melissa McCarthy, as a fat lesbionic-seeming outcast, who is actually the most self-assured and heterosexual dame of the bunch, is so hilarious that I’m actually considering checking her out on Mike & Molly.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but rarely have I wanted so badly to reach through a movie screen and punch a character in the face. And you will, too.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Jon Hamm gets the biggest Dick Award. And since this isn’t the AVN’s, I’m obviously talking about his personality.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Kristen Wiig is the new Lucille Ball. She can tackle the broad and farcical, and still bring it back for the sad and dramatic moments. Rose Byrne is proving to be a lot more versatile than I ever would have guessed from all the boring dramatic work she’s done-- in fact, she's quickly making her way to the top of my list of comedic leading ladies. And Jill Clayburgh is dead. Try not to think about how weird that is while you watch her walking and talking for her last time on film. Now that I’ve mentioned it, you will be able to think of nothing else.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The comic scenes are pretty perfect, but there are a few parts that need to be paced up, especially in the emotional sequences.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: You can tell without knowing it that Kristen Wiig is a co-writer because in certain scenes, other people start talking like her… with the weird awkward pauses… followed by some additional piece of information they didn’t really need to divulge. I’m in favor. More people should talk like Kristen Wiig.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: It’s such a relief to see female characters acting like real women, who are funny and goofy and have a banter and language all their own. Women who can speak to each other openly and candidly, if for no other reason than to hit their necessary daily quota of words. Oh, and the trouble with weddings, don’t get me started on how true this story really is. Women have it rough. And that’s why we’re funny. So why are our stories so blatantly missing from our multiplexes?… Kristen Wiig, Tina Fey, and Jane Lynch are not the exceptions, they are the rule. Get used to it.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: Bridesmaids Trailer

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Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Jumping the Broom


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A woman (Paula Patton) from a high class family jumps into a marriage with a man (Laz Alanso) from a lower class family.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Angela Bassett, Paula Patton, Laz Alonso, Loretta Devine, Meagan Good, Tasha Smith, Julie Bowen, DeRay Davis, Valarie Pettiford, Mike Epps, Pooch Hall, Romeo Miller, Brian Stokes Mitchell, Gary Dourdan, T.D. Jakes

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. Only the beautiful cast and gorgeous locations will keep your attention on this rehashing of an old and done story, that grasps at originality with scatterbrained plot twists seeming to fall from the pretty blue sky.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The pronunciation of French might. I don't know if you've heard, but I speak fluently. Well, I understood none of it. Even after reading the subtitles, explaining what they were trying to say.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: It snuck up on me with a most predictable and obvious tear-jerk toward the end. I saw it coming and I still got watery. I feel so ashamed.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Best Reason I think I've Ever Seen to Be a Cougar. Lil' Romeo's all grown up, and oh, my...

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Loretta Devine is a special treat I've only recently discovered, and Mike Epps surprised me with his range in this character.But Paula Patton is beauty who has yet to convince me she can act (yes, I saw Precious). And Julie Bowen, whom I love in Modern Family, is just weird in this.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: I know the directing is good because the script is bad and I still didn't hate it.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The script plays like it was written for white people, and when they couldn't get it set up because it sucks, they said, "Hey, what if we did this with Black people instead? Black people will see anything!" Their words, not mine.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: Jumping the Broom Trailer

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Wednesday, October 13, 2010

You Again


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A woman (Kristen Bell) goes home to her brother's wedding and finds out that he's marrying her high school nemesis (Odette Yustman).

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Kristen Bell, Odette Yustman, Jamie Lee Curtis, Sigourney Weaver, Jimmy Wolk, Betty White, Victor Garber, Kyle Bornheimer, Billy Unger, Sean Wing, Kristin Chenoweth

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. This movie will be passable on video because Sigourney Weaver, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Kristin Chenoweth are fun in it. Other than that it consists of a series of bad impulse decisions made by its characters, which sometimes lead to comedy, and sometimes lead to lame attempts at comedy. Hey, at least they tried...

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Maybe out of peer pressure.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If it could, it would have made me, because I was feeling extra sensitive, as proven by the fact that I nearly cried in the preview for Burlesque, simply from the sound of Christina Aguilera's amazing singing voice.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: This may surprise you, but I'm gonna give Odette Yustman the Breakout Star of the Year Award. Her performance reminded me of early Rachel McAdams, and we've all seen what she's been able to do since then.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Bottom line, Kristen Bell's agent should not have let her do this role. It makes her look less attractive than her buzz claims her to be, and after When in Rome, it's the second in a line of not very good romantic comedies, she's been expected to hold up. Granted, this one is a chef d'oeuvre in comparison.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Andy Fickman's work hearkens back to absolutely nothing you'd remember having watched.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Think Mean Girls: the Sequel, 10, 30, and 50 years later (keeping in mind that sequels are rarely as good as their originals). High school is over, but those old traumatic memories linger on... which is why it's a good policy to be stoned throughout high school. Take my word for it, you won't remember anything that happened!

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Is The Rock having a hard time getting hired these days? This movie has, like, the third single-scene cameo I've seen him play recently.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/you-again/38333/trailers

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Monday, September 13, 2010

Heartbreaker (L'arnacoeur)


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A man (Romain Duris) is hired to break up couples by seducing the woman.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Romain Duris, Vanessa Paradis, Julie Ferrier, Francois Damiens, Helena Noguerra, Andrew Lincoln, Jacques Frantz, Amandine Dewasmes, Jean-Yves Lafesse, Jen-Marie Paris

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. This romantic-comedy is France's entry into the Failure to Launch category. Meaning, it's impossible in every way, from the ridiculous premise about a non-existent job, to the cheesy romantic dialogue, that even the most passionate of French women would never fall for. But there's something about it that still manages to charm the pants off of you.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: If dialogue like, "You've awakened me, I feel alive again... But it's too late for me. You, you deserve better than what I can give," doesn't get you laughing, then try to imagine it being said at the end of a first date.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but the fake crying the actors do will make you cringe.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Cutest use of spelling in a title (see original language title). You see, in French, the word for a swindler is "arnaqueur," which is pronounced the same way the French title of this movie would be pronounced if it were a real word. But what they did, instead of spelling it correctly, was to combine the word swindle (arnac) with the word for heart (coeur)-- get it?! He's a heart swindler!!!

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Romain Duris is currently one of the biggest stars in France. I've always enjoyed his movies, but I've never understood why France picked him. He's always reminded me of my first love, who I never found particularly attractive. In this movie, he is regularly referred to as extremely pulchritudinous, and he acts like he knows he's gifted with good-looks. I tried to just go with it, but in the end, the only line that rang true to me was when a bartender asked how a guy like him could end up with a girl like Vanessa Paradis, who in real life is married to Johnny Depp, and is absolutely his equal in the looks department, despite a gap the size of a tooth in between her two front teeth.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Very Hollywood.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Apparently the original writer, Laurent Zeitoun, got the idea for this story when one of his cousins was gonna marry a jackass, and he joked that they should hire an actor to step in and break them up. While I agree that that is a great way to come up with an original screenplay idea, it's still a terrible idea for a screenplay.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Tonally, this movie is reminiscent of the Audrey Tatou vehicle Priceless (hors de prix). I thought that movie was okay with a few good jokes, but ultimately pretty silly, but other people who saw it and mentioned it to me over the years almost unanimously enjoyed it more than they had expected they would. Because the response to that film turned out so positively, I expect this little French goof to have a similar effect on people.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/heartbreaker-larnacoeur/10026691/trailers

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Friday, September 10, 2010

The Romantics


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A girl (Katie Holmes) is asked to be the maid of honor as the love of her life (Josh Duhamel) marries her best friend (Anna Paquin).

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Katie Holmes, Josh Duhamel, Anna Paquin, Malin Akerman, Adam Brody, Dianna Agron, Jeremy Strong, Rebecca Lawrence, Candice Bergen, Elijah Wood

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketStop! I was all set to moderately like this movie until the ending, which was like when a guy is torn between the woman he's marrying and the woman he loves, and then it rains... Oops, spoiler alert.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Yes, it's like Rachel Getting Married, but with jokes.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: It might have if you got to find out what happened.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I'd like to give an Irony Award to the Casting Director, who placed 5'8'' Katie Holmes next to hobbit Elijah Wood in scene after scene, and picked Anna Paquin for a character that is continually referred to as "enviably gorgeous," when she's clearly the least attractive woman in the movie. Even Candice Bergen at 64 is sexier.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Once I got over the fact that Katie Holmes is fake-married to Tom Cruise, I began to enjoy her performance. But Malin Akerman (as always) and Adam Brody were the ones with the chemistry.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Several shots are visibly grainy as if they had to push the exposure in post-production.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Galt Niederhoffer has way too much experience to think it's okay to tell a story without an ending.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/the-romantics/10024556/trailers

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Friday, September 3, 2010

White Wedding


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A groom (Kenneth Nkosi) and his best man (Rapulana Seiphemo) try to make it from Johannesburg to Cape Town, to be on time for the wedding, but everything seems to be going wrong.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Kenneth Nkosi, Rapulana Seiphemo, Jodie Whittaker, Zandile Msutwana, Sylvia Mngxekeza, Mbulelo Grootboom, Marcel Van Heerden, Grant Swanby

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. It's cute for a South African rom-com, but Americans would have done it better. And they have.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: What it lacks in laugh out loud comedy, it makes up for in charm.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: What's sad about it, is learning that there are still groups of people who mourn the loss of apartheid openly and without shame.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It was South Africa's submission for this year's Academy Awards in the Best Foreign Feature category. I can see why they lost.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: I watched Rapulana Seiphemo play a bad ass gangster, earlier this year, in Gangster's Paradise: Jerusalema, so it was fun to watch him in a comedy role. The rest of the acting is decent, but some of their accents make them sound like they are having a hard time speaking English.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Aside from one nice transition where everyone is washing their faces, Jann Turner's directing is completely banal.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: This is the aspect that I'm talking about, when I say that Americans would've done it better. From Forces of Nature, to Leap Year, to the upcoming Due Date, to the John Hughes film that started it all, Planes, Trains and Automobiles, Americans have made this movie a million times, but with stronger comedy and more moving emotional parts. Then again, there's something to be said for the cultural differences that a South African sensibility brings to the party.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/white-wedding/1430268/trailers

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Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Ramona and Beezus


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Based on the Beverly Cleary novels, Ramona is just about the most independent, unorthodox, original 9-year-old there is. Unfortunately, when a girl can't fit in, even when she tries to, it can make for some pretty embarrassing elementary school moments.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Joey King, Selena Gomez, John Corbett, Bridget Moynahan, Ginnifer Goodwin, Josh Duhamel, Jason Spevack, Sierra McCormick, Sandra Oh, Hutch Dano

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. At first it's unclear what the story is about, but it maintains your interest because the main character is terrifical!

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The comedy is soft but delishus.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: The last 15 minutes will have you welling up over and over again for one reason and then the next... Hell, no! I didn't allow no tears to actually drop!

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Most Ineptly Titled film of the year. Why is it called Ramona and Beezus when it should simply be called This Movie is About Ramona, and Only Ramona, So Help Me God?

Q: How is the Acting?

A: What a star! Joey King as Ramona is extraordinary. Spelled E-X-T-R-A-O-R-D-I-N-A-R-Y. See I can use Ms. Meacham's words in a sentence, too... Okay, I admit, I looked it up on dictionary.com.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: There are some partially animated imagination sequences that bring the directing to a slightly higher level than one might expect from a movie targeting 8-year-old girls.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: I know I read some Ramona books, though I'm pretty certain that I didn't read this one, and I'm even more certain that it's been almost 30 years since the last time I picked one up (yes, I learned to read 5 years before I was conceived), so I can't say if it's true to the book or not. What I can say is that the last 20 minutes are good enough to make up for the lack of direction in the first hour and a half.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/ramona-and-beezus/31195/trailers

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Monday, May 10, 2010

Letters to Juliet


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: In Verona, Italy, there is a wall where broken-hearted lovers write letters to Juliet Capulet. While on a pre-wedding honeymoon with her semi-absent fiancé, Sophie (Amanda Seyfried) discovers this tradition and writes back to a woman (Vanessa Redgrave) who left a letter there 50 years ago, changing the course of that woman's life as well as her own.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Amanda Seyfried, Christopher Egan, Vanessa Redgrave, Gael Garcia Bernal, Franco Nero, Luisa Ranieri, Marina Massironi, Lidia Biondi, Milena Vukotic, Luisa De Santis, Marcia DeBonis

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. The problem with young love is that it's based on feelings, smells, and other animal instincts. That kind of love doesn't tell you anything about what your day to day life would be like with someone if you were to actually marry them. And since that's the only part of the love that is shown or expressed in either of the main couples, I am left with a feeling, smell and animal instinct that in real life, they're not gonna make it.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Some of the sincerely delivered declarations of true love are kind of laughable.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: The violins in the score sure do try hard to push you in that direction.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: The award here goes out to Missed Connections on craigslist.com and Facebook. Thanks to computers, these days, we can track down all our star-crossed past loves without the nasty expense of flying all the way to Italy... Wait, what I meant to say was, "Damn you, computers!!!"

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Amanda Seyfried is lucky I've seen Chloe, Mean Girls, and Mamma Mia, because if I had to rely on this film alone to judge her acting, I'd think she was very mediocre. And I don't know where they dug up this British* guy, Christopher Egan, but he walks funny, and unfortunately, it lowers his sex appeal by at least half. (*I've just been informed that they dug up the British guy in Australia. Which explains why they liked him, because with an Australian accent, this guy is practically a clone of Heath Ledger. And who wouldn't want to discover the next Heath Ledger?... But looks aside, I'm not convinced he's it.)

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Everyone in the film has noticeably beautiful eyes, and can someone please tell me why I've never been to Italy?! Oh, wow, I just figured out what you guys are buying me for my birthday.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: So the reason we're supposed to dislike the original fiancé is because he's too passionate about his work. Okay, first of all, he works as a restaurateur, and while in Italy he wants to go to all his vendors to taste their wine, cheese, olive oil, and salami. I'm sorry, but how does she manage to find fault in that? That's what people go to Italy to do! Second of all, I don't remember the last time I met a guy who was that passionate about his work, because if I did, I'd probably be in love with him as we speak. And lastly, what on Earth does she see in the pompous English a-hole that she's forced to travel with, and when exactly do they fall in love?The only "moment" I saw, was the one when he went from hating her to staring at her with googly eyes for no apparent reason.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: There's too much looking for Lorenzo.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/letters-to-juliet/37890/trailers

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Saturday, February 27, 2010

Cop Out


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A pair of buddy cops (Bruce Willis & Tracy Morgan) get suspended from the force for playing by their own rules, but continue to play by their own rules when one of them gets robbed of a rare baseball card, which he needs to sell so he can pay for his daughter's wedding. Further proving that weddings get you into trouble.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Bruce Willis, Tracy Morgan, Guillermo Diaz, Seann William Scott, Kevin Pollak, Adam Brody, Cory Fernandez, Michelle Trachtenberg, Rashida Jones, Jason Lee, Francie Swift, Ana de la Reguara, Susie Essman, Fred Armisen

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. Did you ever wonder what would happen if you remade Lethal Weapon, but you made the Black guy the crazy one and the White guy the one who's getting too old for this sh-t? Add in some zaniness, some dick jokes, and a far less professional filming style, and presto! You don't have to wonder anymore.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Probably, but the humor is as annoying as it is funny.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Maybe if you're a baseball collector.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: This script was on the 2008 Blacklist, which is an elite list of the best films that executives in Hollywood read that year. Either they changed a lot of it since then, or Hollywood executives are easily fooled by a few clever jokes, into thinking that an entire script is good.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Bruce Willis was once considered a comic genius of his time, but this film makes him look like he's getting too old for this sh-t. He works too hard in his performance, and still has no clear character definition, as he holds back from laughing at Tracy Morgan's improvs. Adam Brody, on the other hand, has an understated naturalness to his comedic style that I'd be happy to see explored more in bigger roles.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: It's hard to believe that after 14 years, Kevin Smith still directs like an amateur. His close ups are too tight for the big screen, they are inappropriate for the emotional level of the story, his shot selections are boring and don't always help us follow the story, and he manages to make veterans (like Bruce Willis) look like they can't act. Look, he seems like a nice, intelligent guy, and I would love to sit down at the dinner table with him for some stimulating conversation, but why does he continue to get away with such embarrassing work? Will somebody please tell him to take a directing class?

Q: How is the story/script?

A: So long as you leave your sense of maturity and reality at home, there are a few good jokes and sequences, within this cliche story that could have been any rejected buddy cop script after a quick search and replace to, "Insert raunchier dick joke here."

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: The original title of this movie was A Couple of Dicks. Which is both more clever and explains why so many dick jokes.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/cop-out/36928/trailers

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Thursday, February 4, 2010

When in Rome


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A workaholic curator (Kristen Bell), who doesn't believe in love, picks 5 coins out of a fountain of love, in Rome, and is surprised to find the previous owners of those coins (Danny DeVito, Will Arnett, Dax Shepard, Jon Heder, & Josh Duhamel) chasing her around New York, like crazy in love puppy dogs, who will do anything to impress her. Really? Not a single one of the coins that she picked was tossed in by a woman? I find that unlikely.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Kristen Bell, Josh Duhamel, Will Arnett, Danny DeVito, Jon Heder, Dax Shepard, Anjelica Huston, Alexis Dziena, Kate Micucci, Peggy Lipton, Bobby Moynihan, Luca Calvani, Keir O'Donnell, Kristen Schaal, Lee Pace, Judith Malina

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketStop! I might almost have given this a yellow light, only because I know there are people, like my friend Stacy, who have less discriminating taste, and don't mind when a movie has glaring flaws, so long as it's cute. Thankfully, Stacy was with me at this screening, and she hated it. If Stacy doesn't like it, nobody will.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Mostly after you leave the theater, and you challenge yourself to think of a single thing about it that made any logical sense. Not only were the coin tossers all men, they were all American men, who happened to be in Italy that day, and in New York two days later, with a psychic knowledge of Bell's name and whereabouts at any given time.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you cry at cliches, this movie is one... only without the tear-jerking parts.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I'm going to go ahead and give it a Razzie for the hair department. I don't know if they give Razzies for hair, but someone on that set thought it was a good idea to put Kristen Bell's hair in a pony tail at a fancy Italian wedding. Yeah, the kind of pony tail you wear to go jogging, or to brush your teeth.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Kristen Bell acted like a girl who would turn away Josh Duhamel, so that probably took some heavy sense memory work. And Josh Duhamel acted like a wuss, who would come back to a fairly average girl like Bell, no matter how many different ways she rejected him and walked out on him. Since I'm pretty sure he's never experienced anything like that in his real life, I imagine he had to dig pretty deep to figure out what that might feel like, too.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: You almost feel sorry for the director on a piece like this, because where the script is lacking, he has to make it up. Like, for example, when the writers forget to put in the romance, the director has to make up for it with that old standby: the slow motion stare... "Oh," you will think to yourself, "They must be in love at first sight now!"

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It really would've been nice if there were even one single moment based in some kind of reality. One believable thing sprinkled in... Or maybe at least a joke once in while. Is that too much to ask?

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/when-in-rome/33121/trailers

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Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Leap Year


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Following an Irish tradition, a woman (Amy Adams) flies to Ireland to propose to her boyfriend (Adam Scott) on Leap Day. But to her dismay her travel plans fail at every step of the way, and she gets stuck with a guide (Matthew Goode) who is her polar opposite… I wonder if they’ll attract?

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Amy Adams, Matthew Goode, Adam Scott, John Lithgow, Kaitlin Olson

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. Most of the twists and turns that keep the unlikely couple from getting to their destination require that they be extremely careless and idiotic, and that you, the audience, suspend your disbelief. So it starts out pretty corny, but by the end it actually gets you saying, “Aw. That was cute.”

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Yes, at how predictable it is.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Yes, at how predictable it is.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It deserves the Irish Tourism Board Award, because any woman who sees this will quickly come to believe that Ireland is not only beautiful and rustic, but also the current residence of that gorgeous man she has yet to meet and marry.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: I have yet to meet and marry Matthew Goode, myself. No, actually, I’m not into actors. But I do have yet to see Matthew Goode fall short of superb in any of the versatile roles I’ve seen him play. Amy Adams, while much less versatile, is perfectly adorable as usual. And no one could’ve been better cast for the role of the kind and loving but self-obsessed and superficial boyfriend than Adam Scott.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The directing in this movie will have you asking, “Who is Anand Tucker?”… No, actually it won’t. In fact if you asked a group of people who’d just come out of seeing this film that very question, they would most likely reply, “I don’t know. Who?”

Q: How is the story/script?

A: If not for the participation of Amy Adams, this could have just as easily ended up on the Hallmark Channel.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/search/leap%20year/trailers

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Thursday, December 17, 2009

The Princess and the Frog


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A woman, dressed as a princess, kisses a frog-prince to try to turn him back into a human-prince, but instead, she gets turned into a frog.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Anika Noni Rose, Bruno Campos, Keith David, Michael-Leon Wooley, Jennifer Cody, Jim Cummings, Peter Bartlett, Jenifer Lewis, Oprah Winfrey, Terrence Howard, John Goodman, Elizabeth M. Dampier, Breanna Brooks

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketGo! But maybe don't bring your children, unless you're okay with exposing them to a flashing joke, a main character who's a lazy womanizer, and a thinly veiled cougar/pedophilia joke.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Yes. There's a flashing joke, a main character who's a lazy womanizer, and a thinly veiled cougar/pedophilia joke!

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: The Black community will cry when they realize that they finally got their Disney princess, and she spends most of the movie as a frog.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: If MTV knows what it's doing, it will nominate these frogs for Best Kiss-- or at least Most Tongue-tied.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: The voice cast is dynamic and versatile, both in the acting and the singing. My only complaint is that I never saw the moment in the frog-prince's face when he falls for our heroine, nor did I really know what it was about her that he fell for. But since most of us know how this story goes, I still went with it.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The musical numbers, particularly those in the Bayou are an imaginative spectacle. But personally, I was most partial to the way the princess was drawn as a young girl, because she looked just like my adorable little niece, Laila. Have I told you lately that I love her?

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The script is predictable as can be, but the songs are some of the best I've ever heard in a Disney musical. That's what they get for using jazz, blues and gospel as their base.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/the-princess-and-the-frog/30244/trailers

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Sunday, November 22, 2009

Up in the Air

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A professional down-sizer (George Clooney) prides himself on having the perfect life, which consists of flying around the country firing people without ever having to make any real human connections. Then, two women (Anna Kendrick & Vera Farmiga) come along and create circumstances, at work and at play respectively, that force him to start doubting the validity of the lifestyle he has come to cherish.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: George Clooney, Vera Farmiga, Anna Kendrick, Jason Bateman, Melanie Lynskey, Danny McBride, Zach Galifianakis, J.K. Simmons, Tamala Jones, Amy Morton

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. This film is much closer in tone and style to Thank You for Smoking than it is to Juno-- which Reitman didn't write. If you loved Juno, this is nothing like it. If you loved Thank You for Smoking, you may be in business, as this story also focuses on justifying a controversial job, and how it makes the man who does it cold hearted. Ultimately, the film is extremely well done, but thoroughly depressing and anxiety inducing, so unless you can detach yourself from the feelings it's eliciting in you, watching this may not be all that enjoyable. Especially if you're experiencing the effects of the current economic climate.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: A lot of times you will think something is funny without actually having any urge to laugh about it.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but in a weird way, it could inspire you to get back on your anti-depressant medication.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It's highly likely to be nominated in the Screenplay, Directing, and Best Picture categories, but I think it's only got an outside chance of winning a WGA Award (Writers Guild of America).

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Vera Farmiga's face can say everything while doing nothing. George Clooney's face can say nothing much while doing anything. And Anna Kendrick's face only ever seems to say one thing, which I believe is something to the effect of, "The thing in my butt is stuck so far up there, that my gas has backed up all the way to my eyeballs, which I regularly have to squint and squeeze shut, in order to prevent myself from letting one rip out of my peep holes. And I really don't wanna do that, because then anyone who sees it will think I'm an eye-farting weirdo, and I totally can't handle the embarrassment." Just watch, you'll see what I'm talking about.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Jason Reitman knows what he's doing. From the moment the opening credits start to roll, he establishes his visual themes, setting them to high energy music that gets you fired up for what you are about to see, and he maintains his clearly defined personal style throughout. Did I just say "personal style"? Tyra would be so proud.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The craft is remarkable. This is one of those scripts that manages to clearly communicate almost all of what it wants to say without ever saying any of it directly. Unfortunately, the one place where it fails to communicate clearly is at the ending, which is ambiguous, and may or may not be completely devoid of hope, depending on how you chose to interpret it.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/up-in-the-air/34956/trailers

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Wednesday, June 24, 2009

The Proposal

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: When a powerhouse publisher (Sandra Bullock) finds out she's getting deported back to Canada, she blackmails her assistant (Ryan Reynolds) into marrying her for the Green Card. Because she's a beeatch!

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Sandra Bullock, Ryan Reynolds, Betty White, Mary Steenburgen, Craig T. Nelson, Malin Akerman, Oscar Nunez, Denis O'Hare, Aasif Mandvi

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketGo! This movie makes you wanna kiss somebody.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: It's funny how, in romantic comedies, relationships are so much cooler than in real life. I guess real life relationships would be cool, too, if you never had to find out what happens to you after the first three days.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: It makes me cry to know that no matter how many sweet movies I go see, in my real life, the a-holes I encounter never turn out to have a heart. You know who you are... Oh, no wait, you're too full of yourself to know that you don't have a heart. Well, rest assured, we know who you are.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Best night scenes to take place in full daylight. Thank you, Alaska. You are a very confusing place. But at least now I understand why you pick such strange leadership. You haven't had a good night's sleep since last winter.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Cliche alert!!! Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds have great chemistry... But they actually do. And Oscar Nunez gets laughs just for showing up. (You'll know what I mean when you see it.)

Q: How is the Directing?

A: I love that Anne Fletcher's career is thriving! What would I love more? To see more than one woman director thriving at a time. One scene I was particularly impressed by was the naked collision scene. Spoiler alert!!! (Not really-- it's in the trailer) She manages to show all the movement and action of naked people accidentally walking into each other, without showing any of the nudity. I sat for several moments wondering how she pulled it off so well. When I see it on DVD, I'll make a point to pay closer attention.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Peter Chiarelli does a nice job setting up a story that seems impossible to justify. Sure you have to ignore a couple of realities, like the sexual harrassment lawsuit Reynolds could have filed and won, but the one thing I had a hard time overlooking-- and I'm sorry if it sounds like I'm stereotyping-- was Sandra Bullock's personality. Because I have never met a Canadian that wasn't nice.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/the-proposal/30250/trailers

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Sunday, June 7, 2009

The Hangover

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A bunch of guys go to Vegas for a bachelor party, and get into a lot of trouble, none of which they remember.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, Zach Galifianakis, Justin Bartha, Heather Graham, Sasha Barrese, Jeffrey Tambor, Ken Jeong, Rachael Harris, Mike Epps, Rob Riggle, Cleo King, Brian Callen, Matt Walsh, and Mike Tyson as himself.

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketGo! Every once in a while I go to a movie that I know I'm going to love... And then I don't love it. For me, this was one of those times. So why am I telling you to go? Because I know that a lot of you are going to enjoy this film more than I did, and watch it over and over in your college dorm rooms, while taking bong loads, and slipping yourselves roofies. Now that that's out of the way, let me tell you why for my "money, baby," it didn't meet its full potential. While this film is relatable to anyone who's tried to go to Vegas to sin as hard as they can, there are a lot of missed opportunities that could've made it more emotionally and psychologically compelling. The characters are undeveloped beyond being caricatures of wacky people who gain and lose personality traits according to the story's needs. And they experience no growth from having lived through this incredibly extreme situation. So ultimately, to me, the film ends up feeling like nothing more than a slice of life, held together through a series of moderately funny vignettes.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Men will laugh from beginning to end at the juvenile and irresponsible behavior they have come to admire so much in themselves and others. Women will smile from beginning to end, but probably not laugh out loud, as they are faced with a constant reminder of how they usually find themselves picking up the pieces.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: The best comedies always move you... This one doesn't even think to try. And the most disappointing part is that it could have without a lot of effort.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: The movie might not be, but this review may be in serious contention as my Most Controversial and Hated one to date. "It's about Vegas," you say, "It's not supposed to be that deep." But it breaks my heart to see something come so close to greatness and then miss the mark by leaving out such obvious and simple story beats as the lesson learned.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: They've been trying to groom Bradley Cooper into our next leading man, and this performance is just more proof that he can pull it off. But in the long run, this will be most remembered as Zach Galifianakis's breakout, as he introduces the masses to the character he's been playing in his real life for years. He's a strange cat, but nobody else does what he does better.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Down deep, I think we all know that Vegas is a lot more exhausting and stressful than it is fun and glamorous. By coupling slick dutch angles, a fun soundtrack, and sudden breaks for slow-mo, with shots of the seediness of the strip's backside, and the constant construction, whose only aim is to con you into losing your entire net worth in seconds flat, Todd Phillips manages to capture both the excitement of being in a supposed black hole of what counts toward your real life, and the stress of the real life consequences that anyone with half a brain knows have no chance of actually staying in Vegas.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Even my friend, Xavier, who's not a professional screenwriter, was able to see that this story never chooses a main character to follow, and suffers from it, because we are never given any reason to care about any of them. Sure, they have wacky personalities that make for funny jokes, but we really don't know who any of these two dimensional people are, or what they want. Only Ed Helms becomes a slightly better person from this wild journey, but even in his case we don't know what it is about the experience that causes him to change, or for that matter, what it was about him that caused him to be in a demented and abusive relationship in the first place. And this, our inability to relate to or understand the characters' motivations and thought processes, is exactly why we don't get that feeling of magic inside our guts, that is the reason most of us go to the movies, and why I didn't leave feeling 100% satisfied.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: The sound is not turned up high enough on a lot of the dialogue, especially when it comes to Zach's lines, which he often mumbles under his breath. Obviously, this won't be a problem once it gets to DVD, and you can rewind.  Also, the funniest part of the movie takes place during the closing credits.  Some would consider this a brilliant move, because you leave the theater as the movie hits its highest point.  But in some ways, it's a cop-out to finally show us what really happened to these guys after the story has already ended.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/the-hangover/35061/trailers

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