Despicable Me

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: An evil villain (Steve Carell) attempts to steal the Moon, in a last ditch effort to prove that he's the best bad guy in the world, but his plans start to falter when 3 orphan girls come into his life.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Steve Carell, Jason Segel, Russell Brand, Julie Andrews, Miranda Cosgrove, Kristen Wiig, Will Arnett, Dana Gaier, Elsie Fisher, Jack McBrayer, Jemaine Clement, Danny McBride, Mindy Kaling, and the Minions

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! Whatever the story departments in the animation world are doing, live action development people should figure it out and start imitating it as soon as possible. In some of these animated movies, it almost feels like someone cared about the user experience... and these are the movies that are supposed to be for little kids, you know, those small-sized people with completely undeveloped minds.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Most of the cleverness is in the details, so pay very close attention.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: It goes so far as to make you say, "Awwww." Out loud.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: As enthusiastic as I may seem about this movie, it's not that good.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: I was impressed with Steve Carell's accent-- not because I could place what country it was supposed to be from, but because it totally made you forget that it was Steve Carell. Same goes for Russell Brand, who really sounds old. But it goes without saying that the best voice comes from Elsie Fisher, a little girl who can't be more than 8-years-old, and should be able to parlay this into being the next Dakota Fanning.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Pretty standard.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The writers do a nice job of creating an antihero with a backstory that makes you sympathize with him. They quickly establish how mean he is, then suddenly show you why, then the plot sets in motion, and emotionally, you understand what a guy like this is getting out of hanging around a bunch of little girls. The girls are also established in such a way that you buy that they would be accepting of this man's strange home and lifestyle.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/despicable-me/36148/trailers

Back To Top

The Last Song

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A rebellious teen (Miley Cyrus) is forced to spend the summer at the beach with her dad (Greg Kinnear), where she meets a boy (Liam Hemsworth) and falls in love. Whoa, tough life.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Miley Cyrus, Greg Kinnear, Bobby Coleman, Liam Hemsworth, Hallock Beals, Kelly Preston, Nick Lashaway, Carly Chaikin, Kate Vernon, Melissa Ordway

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Stop! This ain't no Hannah Montana. And whatever you may think about the double-life-living Disney character, at least her stories don't make you regret having wasted your time watching them.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Miley's turn as a serious actress might.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: I want to say no, but for saps like me, there is a ray of light that could move you to the point of having to be embarrassed about it. (Sometimes I wonder if I have any standards at all...)

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: If Miley Cyrus wants to win awards, I'm gonna highly recommend that she stick with Hannah Montana, and continue aiming for Kid's Choice.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: When I was a teenager I believed deeply in love at first sight. But this movie helped me realize that it's a concept that can only exist when all parties involved are drop dead gorgeous, since naturally, "first sight" implies that nobody cares about the other's personality. I wasn't particularly sold on Liam Hemsworth's acting, but I have to give him credit for trying to sell the idea that he could instantly be attracted to Miley, despite the fact that she's acting like a rude, angry, little female dog. Unfortunately for her, this kind of selfish, bitter character makes her look both ugly and dumb. Bring back the blond wig and the fake teeth!

Q: How is the Directing?

A: My first directing teacher once said, "Directors are judged on their taste in material." So while Julie Anne Robinson's directing is perfectly passable, I'm still giving her an F for the day.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The drama manages to be both superficial and contrived. Shame on you Nicholas Sparks, for not taking your name off this unoriginal story, which was obviously written by a ghost apprentice, who was trying unsuccessfully to imitate your work in Dear John.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/the-last-song/37683/trailers

Back To Top

Remember Me

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: After getting into an altercation with a cop (Chris Cooper), a college student (Robert Pattinson) decides to date the cop's daughter (Emilie de Ravin), as a means to get back at him.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Robert Pattinson, Emilie de Ravin, Ruby Jerins, Chris Cooper, Tate Ellington, Pierce Brosnan, Lena Olin, Gregory Jbara, Chris McKinney

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. The vampire from Twilight is only half as brooding in this version of the one character he plays. But without the white face makeup, he's twice as hot. So it's a toss up.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The story opens on a woman getting murdered in front of her 11-year-old daughter, and then cuts to a different set of characters visiting the grave site of their 22-year-old brother. So you may want to laugh, but the people sitting around you may take death a little more seriously than you do, and that can get awkward.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: For all the death and drama going on, the only thing that might make you cry is the ending, which is totally exploitative of a true event that should never have been used in this way. It insults our intelligence, and makes the true situation feel like a cheap trick.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I would've given it the award for hottest male nudity (Rob Pattinson), but there wasn't any... What were the filmmakers thinking?!

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Sometimes, when the little girls in the film have scenes with R-Patz, you can see them thinking, "OMG! I'm talking to Edward, right now!"

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Allen Coulter does a good job of keeping Pattinson in focus in the foreground, and Emilie de Ravin in the shadows... he knows which one is easier on the eyes. And frankly, aside from Pierce Brosnan, who holds his own, you almost start to feel sorry for the actors who have to share the screen with Pattinson. It's hard on all of us when we realize we're the ugliest person in a room.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: This is another case of a compelling logline for a romantic comedy, which goes off topic in the second act because it has run out of conflict to explore. Now I know this is a romantic drama, and not a romantic comedy, but it dawns on me that there would have been a lot more ground to cover in this premise had it been a comedy instead. Well, I guess I'll just hold my breath until the Will Ferrell version comes out.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: It's funny, in a screening like this, you get a lot of previews for other romances. And what's funnier, is watching all the men who were dragged there by their girlfriends quickly turn to them with a preemptive, "No! I'm not seeing that." But we all know that when the time comes, they're seeing that.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/remember-me/37888/trailers

Back To Top

Imagine That

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A financial adviser (Eddie Murphy), who is estranged from his young daughter (Yara Shahidi), finds out that her security blanket can take him to a magical world that can predict the stock market. Get it? It's a securities blanket.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Eddie Murphy, Yara Shahidi, Thomas Haden Church, Ronny Cox, Martin Sheen, Bobbe'e J. Thompson, Nicole Ari Parker, James Patrick Stuart, DeRay Davis, Vanessa Williams, Timm Sharp, Talen Ruth Riley, Stephen Root

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. It's very cute, but if you don't have a family to bring, you'll find yourself wondering why you're there.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: There are some laughs. And a couple of them aren't even totally immature.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Maybe if you're on your period... Yes, some girls get it when they're still young enough to be in the demographic for this movie! And don't say, "Eiw," it's a fact of life, it's where babies come from, and you should have a little more compassion for those poor young girls who are already having to deal with it, even though they're only 9 or 10 years old.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Most Adorable Disney Movie to come out of Nickelodeon this year.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Yara Shahidi has a mug you could look at for hours. She is beautiful from all angles, in all hairdos, and in all emotions-- each of which she plays like a real child, but without any of the bad acting that usually comes with having to let a child play the part. It's amazing to think that she's never done a movie before.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Run of the mill, but inoffensive.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: I can't help but wonder whose idea it was to make a children's movie so heavily centered around stock trading. It's hard to imagine that even if there were an imaginary world in which 3 invisible Princesses and a Queen can communicate with a little girl through her blanky, that they would talk to her about which companies' values were going to rise or plummet on the market, the next day. While it's a good device to help the little girl relate better to her dad, kids don't want to see a movie about that, and imaginary royalty certainly wouldn't care about it either.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/imagine-that/28965/trailers

Back To Top

Hannah Montana: The Movie

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: When Hollywood starlet, Hannah Montana (Miley Cyrus), gets too big for her britches, her dad (Billy Ray Cyrus) hijacks her back to Tennessee, to reconnect her with her roots, and Miley bitches.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Miley Cyrus, Billy Ray Cyrus, Lucas Till, Melora Hardin, Emily Osment, Vanessa Williams, Peter Gunn, Margo Martindale, Jason Earles, Michael Musso, Moises Arias, Barry Bostwick

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. If you are or ever have been a pre-teen girl, there is no good reason not to set aside your pretension and indulge in this festival of corniness.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Mostly at how excited all the screaming, pubescent girls in the audience get every time Miley's love interest, Travis, smiles at her. You can feel their hormones raging through you as if they were your own... And that alone is reason enough to see this one in the theaters.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: I'm really too embarrassed to talk about that right now... Please don't lose respect for me.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: At this year's Academy Awards, Miley Cyrus humiliated herself on the red carpet by saying that she hoped to be back next year as a nominee for this movie... But considering that every song in the movie is a number one hit waiting to happen, I think her crazy prediction could actually come true. I even found myself dancing in my chair to some of the country ditties.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Who is Lucas Till?... You won't even need to ask that question in about one week. As Miley's charming, emotionally open, and thoughtful love interest, Lucas Till has just been positioned to compete for a spot on the list of young America's biggest heart throbs. Robert Pattinson watch your back!

Q: How is the Directing?

A: I'm not one to notice "goofs" in a movie, (i.e. continuity mistakes), but in this one I saw several without even trying. Including things like people on stage in one shot, who weren't on stage in the next, and clocks on the wall whose time did not match the lighting or time of day being described in the dialogue.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It stays true to the TV show it's based on, in both wacky tone and ridiculous premise. If you like the silly plots on the Disney Channel show, you will appreciate how the writer built on it to tell the only storyline that justifies a feature length movie. And how could you not like the silly plots on the Disney Channel show? She puts on a blond wig! There's no way anybody could recognize that she's a famous pop star in that disguise!

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Right when you thought line dancing was dead, Miley unleashes her new electric slide on the world. Since this girl is an instant trend factory, second only to Dora the Explorer, I'm just going to throw caution to the wind and accept the fact that we'll all be doing this synchronized dance together the next time we see each other at a wedding, Bar Mitzvah, or other dance-oriented function. See you on the dance floor!

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/hannah-montana-the-movie/33072/trailers

Back To Top

Paul Blart: Mall Cop

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A fat, pathetic loser (Kevin James) falls for a girl who's way out of his league, and despite her rejection, puts his life on the line to save her from a robbery in which she is taken hostage. Do girls ever really fall for that old trick?

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Kevin James, Jayma Mays, Keir O'Donnell, Raini Rodriguez, Shirley Knight, Stephen Rannazzisi, Peter Gerety, Bobby Cannavale, Adam Ferrara, Allen Covert, Jamal Mixon, Adhir Kalyan, Erick Avari

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. If you're the kind of person who laughs at absolutely anything, this movie is for you. If you have standards of any kind, skip it. And separately, if that giant tub of man hadn't done 9 years on TV as the King of Queens, that girl wouldn't give him the time of day, even if he did save her life. She'd say thank you, and ask if they could be friends... Just in case she happened upon an unattractive lonely woman to set him up with.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: If you find an hour and a half of a guy riding around on a Segway funny, all I can say is... Your mother must be very proud.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: I will say this, it is very depressing.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Yes, First Mall Cop Movie to Come Out this Year. (Seth Rogen has one coming soon called Observe and Report, which will undoubtedly be compared to this. Without having seen it, I can guarantee that the Seth Rogen one is better.)

Q: How is the Acting?

A: The ninja gymnastics was the best thing the acting had going for it. I don't know who decided that ninja skateboarders, bmx riders, and half-pipe-riding roller skaters would make for a compelling band of robbers, but if you overlook the ridiculousness of it all, you will notice that their stunts are still more interesting than the parts of the acting that involve words.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: In the scene in the Rainforest Cafe, where Blart takes down the grand majority of the bad guys, you have no idea how he got them. Why? Because the director doesn't show us those parts. Why doesn't he? My guess is because they had run out of ideas by that point in the script. After all, it's not so easy to convince an audience that an out of shape Mall Cop could take on 6 athletic ninja villains, who are all coming at him at once, and win.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: While it couldn't be more lowbrow if it had been a straight to DVD movie, it did have a few clever moments in which Paul Blart had to "outsmart" (in quotes) the robbers, in order to take them down. Considering how much money it's made, you probably have a friend who's already seen it, so maybe you can just get the Cliff's Notes from him.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: They somehow forgot to mention in the promos that this was a Christmas movie. Maybe because there's no more relevant time to put out a Christmas movie than 2 weeks after Christmas is over. God I hate January movies.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/paul-blart-mall-cop/31338/trailers

Back To Top

The Wrestler

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: When an aging professional wrestler's body starts to give up on him (Mickey Rourke), he is forced to realize that he has nothing left but his limited celebrity-- and celebrity doesn't pay the bills or fill the heart.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Mickey Rourke, Marisa Tomei, Evan Rachel Wood, Mark Margolis, Todd Barry, Wass Stevens, Judah Friedlander, Ernest Miller, Dylan Summers, Tommy Farra

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. There are only two reasons to see this film. 1) You love the gore of professional wrestling. Or 2) You want to see Marisa Tomei naked and gyrating... Okay, so that second reason's not such a bad one.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: It's a Darren Aronofsy film, so not very much, to say the least.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you've ever been to New Jersey, the images of that depressing and desolate armpit of a place could bring back some painful memories.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Many of the critics are predicting it will, which makes me want to line them up and shoot them.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Mickey Rourke does make a massive comeback in this film, but that's not reason enough to sit through it. Marisa Tomei proves yet again that her Academy Award was not just a fluke-- only this time, she does it with no clothes on! And Evan Rachel Wood is the same as she ever was.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Not nearly as visually interesting as Requiem for a Dream, but Aronofsky does use little tricks to remind us that he's a professional, like continually shooting Rourke from behind, so that it always looks like he's about to enter a wrestling arena.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The story makes some interesting parallels between the way a wrestler and a stripper start out glamorous in their youth, only to become ridiculous as they age. Unfortunately for people in both professions, the bills don't go away just because you've passed 35 and outlived your usefulness. Yes, the movie is that depressing.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/search/the%20wrestler/trailers

Back To Top