Fair Game

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: The true story of how Ambassador Joe Wilson and his wife, CIA agent Valerie Plame, had inside information about how the reasons we waged war against Iraq in 2003 were a lie. They knew for a fact that we'd been lied to because they were the ones who had done the reconnaissance proving that Iraq had no Weapons of Mass Destruction. But when Wilson spoke up about his findings-- or lack thereof-- Vice President Cheney's office outed Valerie Plame's status as a covert agent, compromising all of the missions she had been working on for her country, and causing the deaths of hundreds of innocent people. And that's not counting all the soldiers and civilians who were killed in the war.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Naomi Watts, Sean Penn, David Andrews, Michael Kelly, Sam Shepard, Bruce McGill, Noah Emmerich, Liraz Charhi, Brooke Smith, Ty Burrell, David Denman, Tim Griffin, David Warshofsky, Kristoffer Ryan Winters, Anand Tiwari, Ashley Gerasimovich, Quinn Broggy, and George W. Bush as himself.

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! We were lied to. You should care.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: If any of Joe Wilson's dialogue is accurate, he's a funny guy!

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Excuse me? You've read this review this far and you're not crying already?

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Hopefully Best Picture, but I'm giving it the Patriot Award, because these people stood up for what's right, even though it was the President who was wrong. And you'd have to be a true red-blooded American to do that.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Having seen two Naomi Watts movies back to back, I can honestly say that she's always the same. By the same but different token, Sean Penn is always the same level of amazing.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: As Doug Liman himself said in the Q & A, his style is recognizable from one film to the next because he doesn't know how to do anything else. And in the long run, that's the kind of comment you come to regret having said.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It starts out heady and hard to follow, but fear not, before long it all becomes clear, emotional, and engrossing, and you realize that you didn't really need to understand any of the things that were going over your head.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: I'm sure some idiot out there will find a way to say that this movie is a lie. And that's why that person will be an idiot.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/fair-game/1428068/trailers

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You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: There's this family, and everyone in it is unhappy and wants to cheat on and/or leave their spouse. Uplifting. Oh, yeah, and one of them is seeing a quack psychic.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Gemma Jones, Naomi Watts, Josh Brolin, Anthony Hopkins, Lucy Punch, Freida Pinto, Antonio Banderas, Roger Ashton-Griffiths, Pauline Collins, Ewen Bremner, Christian McKay, Theo James, Fenella Woolgar, Anna Friel, Neil Jackson, Zak Orth

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. Woody Allen's movies often start with a voice over or inscription citing a quote that outright states the theme of the movie, so when the first words of this film's voice over stated that Shakespeare said life was a lot of sound and fury leading up to nothing, I started to worry. And as foretold, the film is exactly that.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The whole "everybody's unhappy, selfish, and wants to cheat" theme is almost too depressing to allow the humor to play.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If this film is anything more than Woody Allen's cynical viewpoint with a touch of aging thrown in, then we should all cry, because life sucks and then, if you're lucky, you die. If you're unlucky, you're reborn and have to go through the Hell of it all over again.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: The French will think of something. They just love that fool.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Josh Brolin put on weight for the role and Anthony Hopkins lost a bunch. I know some people consider that acting.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Woody Allen's style hasn't evolved since the 70s. In 300 years, you would be able to pick up any of his films and recognize his auteurship by the long shots of two people walking and talking in some urban city. The strangest part is that after all these decades, and in all its simplicity, his style still works.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: This story is a good example of why Woody Allen shouldn't try to do one film a year. There are some incredibly clever twists, which lead to nothing, as they are not resolved. Which leaves me with the impression that he knew he hadn't finished the script, but it was time to start shooting if he was gonna make his self-imposed one film a year schedule, so he tagged on the theme of Shakespeare's "A lot of sound and fury amounting to nothing" as an excuse about why he never bothered to resolve the story... Which, I guess, in itself is pretty clever in its own way.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/you-will-meet-a-tall-dark-stranger/38103/trailers

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They Came to Play

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: This documentary follows the 2007 Van Cliburn International Piano Competition for Outstanding Amateurs, who for the most part, play just as well as professionals despite their "real" jobs as doctors, lawyers, and dental assistants.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: The biggest star is the music, so let me do some name droppin': Bach, Mozart, Chopin, Beethoven, Schubert, Rachmaninoff, Gershwin, Debussy, Schumann... and for you specialists: Alkan, Barber, Ravel, and Liszt

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. If you enjoy classical piano and stories about regular people with amazing musical talent, this film is for you. If you enjoy Piña Coladas and makin' love in the rain it's not.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Surprisingly, there is an erroneous belch in this film. But that's about as rowdy as it gets.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you put your kid in piano classes thinking he'd have a big career, you may as well start crying now, because you only have to watch this doc once to know that for every amazing piano player, there are about 74 amazinger ones, and that's not counting the prodigies.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It actually won an Audience Award in Fort Lauderdale. Them Floridians must be some highfalutin' audience types!

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Culturally, I enjoyed watching how the foreign competitors acted when they lost, in comparison to the American ones. And here is my conclusion: everyone who's not American lets their hurt and disappointment show, while everyone who is American bites his tongues and hopes that no one will notice that he cares. Chew on that, Americans.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: There's not a great variety of shots, but they are all well lit, and the 3 angles chosen to shoot the piano competition are the right ones.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The structure is in line with all the other docs of this nature, including Spellbound, Wordplay, and Mad Hot Ballroom. Only in this doc there are really no great stakes to winning or losing because, as one character puts it, "It's all right, I've got a day job!" (which happens to be as doctor). Sadly, because of the low stakes, there's not that much suspense as to who wins or loses.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2SedHd93DQ

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Four Lions

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A group of British Jihadists prepare to blow themselves up, but based on their behavior, they could just as easily be preparing for a Vaudeville act starring Larry, Curly, and Mo.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Riz Ahmed, Kayvan Novak, Nigel Lindsay, Arsher Ali, Adeel Akhtar, Preeya Kalidas, Julia Davis, Benedict Cumberbatch

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. The idea behind the idea is pretty genius, once you're in on the joke, but it's really challenging to figure out the joke.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: If you can get past the language barrier, and the style of the humor, I'm pretty sure this movie is drop dead hilarious. As for me, I understood about every third word, despite it supposedly being in English.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: The saddest thing about it is that many of the moronic things these would-be suicide bombers do and say are inspired by true events. Like the time the jihadist was on a bicycle, on his way to deliver a bomb, and he veered to avoid a pothole running right into a lamppost. Boom! True story.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: The Wash Your Mouth Out with Soap Award. Thanks to this movie, prematurely exploding doesn't have to be sexual innuendo anymore!

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Nigel Lindsay stands out as being Ali G level funny. Kayvan Novak and Riz Ahmed have the looks to be big stars-- which isn't to say that they weren't funny as all Hell, too. And Julia Davis is just... wow, she has a timing all her own.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The directing is one of the few aspects of the film that is totally amateurish. You rarely know where the characters are in relation to each other or the room, and the look is of embarrassingly low quality. Director Chris Morris comes from a TV background in Great Britain, which is notorious for putting shows on the air that look like they were shot on a 1980s camcorder... but the poor resolution may also have been due to the projection system in the dumpy rent-a-theater I saw it in.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It's particularly hard to figure out if these guys are serious about martyring themselves, or if they're just making some kind of a film within a film about what it would be like if they were. That said, some of the dialogue is pretty brilliant. In a nonsensical way.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/four-lions/10024302/trailers

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Hereafter

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A man in America (Matt Damon) struggles with his gift for talking to the dead, while a woman in France (Cecile de France) struggles with the aftermath of a near-death experience, while a boy in England (Frankie McLaren/George McLaren) struggles with the sudden loss of his twin brother.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Matt Damon, Cecile de France, Jay Mohr, Frankie McLaren, George McLaren, Thierry Neuvic, Bryce Dallas Howard, Richard Kind, Lyndsey Marshal, Rebekah Staton, Declan Conlon, Steven R. Schirripa, Jean-Yves Berteloot, Niamh Cusack, George Costigan, Jenifer Lewis, Marthe Keller, Derek Jacobi

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! I was so into it, that I couldn't stop thinking it was a true story. It's not... But I still think the basic principles of it are.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Clint Eastwood wouldn't know humor if it landed on his head and farted ... Okay, I may just be saying that to get a rise out of the idiot commentators who threatened to rape and kill me when I compared Clint Eastwood's performance in Gran Torino to Will Ferrell. I've erased the comments because they were so incredibly graphic and offensive, but I still wanted to take this occasion to say F-U!

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: As I learned from the aforementioned commentators, death is a very sensitive subject, especially when it's threatened on you. But the answer to this question would have been yes anyway. You will cry.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I kind of hope so, even though this is the kind of "Hollywood" movie that will have all the die hard cineastes up in arms if itwins. It's got a similar vibe to Crash.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: The young boys and their heroin-addicted mother (Lyndsey Marshal) are the surprise break out performances. And Cecile De France has a charm that's reminiscent of Meg Ryan in her prime-- with a cute little French accent to boot.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Anyone who shoots a movie that takes place in not one, but both of my favorite cities in the world, is all right with me. Go ahead, take a guess. Hint: they're the two cities I grew up flying back and forth between. If you've been reading my reviews, you should be able to answer this one by now.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Let me tell you why Peter Morgan is a great writer: even as I'm predicting what's going to happen next, I'm not feeling like I'm watching anything formulaic. Try to figure that one out.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/hereafter/1421819/trailers

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127 Hours

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Based on the book Between a Rock and a Hard Place, by Aron Ralston, about the time he went hiking in Canyon Country and really got caught between a rock and a hard place for 127 hours. Which, if you do the math, like I did, is over 5 days in a canyon.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: James Franco. There are others like Kate Mara, Amber Tamblyn, Treat Williams, Clemence Poesy, Lizzy Caplan, John Lawrence and Kate Burton... but you will only ever remember James Franco.

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. This is a classic film that will be revered in film communities for generations to come. A one man show, based on a true story, brought to life by dynamic filmmaking that gets you inside the captive's mind and outside the endless valley of rocks at the same time. It is a true accomplishment. But it is not fun to watch. In fact, if I get cancer, it's from the stress caused me by this movie.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: He's a funny guy until he comes face to face with death... and even then he can be pretty funny. But the part I'm thinking about now was made up by screenwriter, Simon Beaufoy.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but feel free to bring your own barf bag.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: People often wonder why sometimes a film gets nominated for Best Picture, but it doesn't get nominated for Best Director. The reason is, to make room for films like this that have no chance at a Best Picture, but can absolutely not be overlooked in the Best Director category. Danny Boyle finds ways to expand what we see beyond one man and one canyon, creating moments of horror, most emotionally reminiscent of Jaws. You won't easily forget the feelings or images this film gives you.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: According to Danny Boyle in the Q & A, James Franco keeps super-stardom at bay by constantly seeming as if he were stoned. Underneath that stoned veneer, though, Franco is constantly working and preparing. So much so that they weren't able to interchange dialogue in editing from later parts of the film with earlier parts of the film, because as the days of thirst and starvation went by, Franco had changed the timbre of his voice so dramatically. Also, he's such a method actor, that the studio made them all guarantee that Franco would stay hydrated in real life, so he wouldn't die, despite his initial desire to deprive himself of water to make things feel more real. I know, that's just stupid.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: This story could not survive without the vision, style, and musical choices of Mr. Danny Boyle. Although he blew me away in Trainspotting, and reminded me of his genius in Slumdog Millionaire, 127 Hours is clearly the film most reliant on his skill-set, without which it would be as boring as 5 days is long.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: While he's trapped in the canyon, the script really hopes to be about his regrets. Face to face with death, Aron has a chance to look back on all the love he could've given his family and ex-girlfriend, but didn't. Honestly, that wasn't what resonated with me. I was too busy wondering how on Earth they managed to turn this impossibly enclosed story into a feature film.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: When the film ended, not a single person in my packed audience got up. It may have been because of the Q & A with the writer, director, and producer of Slumdog Millionaire (who also performed their roles on this film, not so coincidentally), but it might also have been because, like me, they were incapable of moving.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/127-hours/10020565/trailers

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Conviction

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: This true story is about a Massachusetts woman (Hilary Swank), with only a GED from high school, who decides to get her BA and her Law Degree in order to prove that her brother (Sam Rockwell) is innocent of the crime he's been incarcerated for.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Hilary Swank, Sam Rockwell, Minnie Driver, Owen Campbell, Conor Donovan, Bailee Madison, Tobias Campbell, Melissa Leo, Karen Young, Loren Dean, Clea DuVall, Juliette Lewis, Ari Graynor, Peter Gallagher

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. If you don't know anything about this story, you will be inspired and amazed by it. If you do know anything about this story, you will see a story about something you already know.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The people sitting behind me and kicking me in the back throughout the movie might've laughed once. But I think that's because they were whispering jokes to each other.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: After approaching me to apologize, the people sitting behind me and kicking me in the back throughout the movie claimed that they couldn't stop crying.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Juliette Lewis will get nominated for Best Supporting Actress, and she will probably win, despite the fact that she only has two scenes. I usually get this category right, so think of me when it comes time for your Oscar pools.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: The people sitting behind me and kicking me in the back throughout the movie claimed that the acting was so good, they felt like they were watching a documentary. Despite my ongoing annoyance and back pain, I, too, had a chance to notice that the acting was of the highest caliber, with a special mention to my man, Sam Rockwell, for being consistently out of this world in everything he does.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The people sitting behind me and kicking me in the back throughout the movie claimed that it was a beautifully made film. The guy specifically responsible for all the kicking, even claimed that he used to be in the business, so he would know. But considering that he doesn't even know how to sit quietly in a movie theater, I'm gonna guess that he was a teamster. (For those of you who don't know, teamsters are the guys who drive the trucks and act like they're in the mob.)

Q: How is the story/script?

A: There are some nice moments, but overall there is something missing. Knowing the outcome of the case took some of the wind out of it for me, but ultimately, while I could see the characters struggling, I never felt their struggle inside my own heart. The people sitting behind me and kicking me in the back throughout the movie would disagree, though. They felt it. Hell, they couldn't stop crying.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Oh my Gosh, I just got the title. You see, he gets a conviction, and his sister has conviction to overturn the conviction. Get it?... For a smart girl, I sure can be dumb sometimes.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/conviction/36474/trailers

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Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: In 2008, a young, up and coming Wall Street trader (Shia LaBeouf) loses his mentor (Frank Langella) and then gets taken for a ride by competing would-be replacements (Michael Douglas, Josh Brolin).

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Michael Douglas, Shia LaBeouf, Josh Brolin, Carey Mulligan, Eli Wallach, Susan Sarandon, Frank Langella, Austin Pendleton, John Bedford Lloyd, Vanessa Ferlito, John Buffalo Mailer

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. I almost loved this movie, but the ending didn't make sense, and then I realized that if I hadn't seen the documentary Inside Job two days before, many parts of the middle wouldn't have made sense either.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Surprisingly, not at all.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Surprisingly, but not at the end.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Carey Mulligan gives us a plethora of Oscar worthy moments.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: I was so glad they figured out how to fit in a cameo by Charlie Sheen. The Oliver Stone cameo, on the other hand, jolted my concentration right out of the movie. I don't even think I could tell you what that scene was about. All I know is there was supposed to be a sex joke in it. I didn't laugh. I was too busy getting over the fact that Stone favored himself over the lead character in the shot. Clearly, he finds himself exceedingly attractive.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The slickest thing about this movie is Gordon Gekko's hair. And for as much as Oliver Stone's random psychedelic cutaways added to the look and feel of Natural Born Killers, that's how much they distract from the look and feel of Wall Street. I would even go so far as to say that some of his choices look remarkably amateurish.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: This script would have been so much more insightful if it had been written before the crash of 2008. As it is now, characters go around acting like they're so smart for telling us what's going to happen in the future, when their future is already in our past. I could've predicted the crash under those circumstances, too.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/wall-street-money-never-sleeps/38914/trailers

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Inside Job

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: This documentary breaks down the whos, whats, hows, and whys of the economic crash of 2008, which caused the financial crisis we're all in today.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Matt Damon does the voice over. I feel the need to tell you this, because you won't notice it if I don't.

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! If you, like I, didn't get around to reading the newspapers over the last 30 or 40 years, this will catch you up on everything you need to know about the financial section. Just don't ask me to tell you what's going on in sports.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: You know what's really funny? It wasn't the idiot layman's fault at all for taking loans they couldn't afford to pay back. We were lied to. You know what's funnier? These guys knew exactly what they were doing as they were screwing everybody, and I think they even kind of knew that they were gonna blame it all on us, the people they screwed, when it fell apart. What better way to convince us to pay them back in taxes for the debts they created?

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: You know what's sad? These guys made enough money with their ponzi scheme to buy off anyone who tries to make them pay back the money they stole, as well as anyone who tries to make them pay in any moral or penitentiaral way for their criminal actions. Yes, they own us, and our little government, too.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Biggest Comeback is going to Eliot Spitzer, who we find out here, was one of the few people who was standing up to Wall Street and trying to fight back to prevent this crash. I'm now convinced that they used the morality card to discredit him so they could get rid of him, because he was trying to stop them from ripping us all off. I'm sure I'm right about this one. Plus, according to the prostitute in this movie, they were all going to the same whores, so it wouldn't've been hard for them to figure out how to ruin him, as they passed each other in the bordello halls.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: The guys who were involved in these crimes are so bad at seeming innocent when asked a direct question, it's a wonder any of them ever got up the corporate ladder at all.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Even though he uses the same scenic shots over and over, Charles Ferguson's shots are exceedingly scenic.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The structure explaining how we got to this point is clear, organized, and perfectly set up by the opening story of how Iceland had been living in some sort of financial utopia until the Americans convinced them to deregulate. Then, within 10 years, Icelanders went from affluent, civilized, and stable to poverty stricken and unemployed. Thank you, America.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Greed is only one of seven deadly sins, but of all the sins a person could commit, this is the one that has the power to cause the most widespread damage and suffering to others. Think about it.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/inside-job/10037867/trailers

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You Again

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A woman (Kristen Bell) goes home to her brother's wedding and finds out that he's marrying her high school nemesis (Odette Yustman).

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Kristen Bell, Odette Yustman, Jamie Lee Curtis, Sigourney Weaver, Jimmy Wolk, Betty White, Victor Garber, Kyle Bornheimer, Billy Unger, Sean Wing, Kristin Chenoweth

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. This movie will be passable on video because Sigourney Weaver, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Kristin Chenoweth are fun in it. Other than that it consists of a series of bad impulse decisions made by its characters, which sometimes lead to comedy, and sometimes lead to lame attempts at comedy. Hey, at least they tried...

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Maybe out of peer pressure.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If it could, it would have made me, because I was feeling extra sensitive, as proven by the fact that I nearly cried in the preview for Burlesque, simply from the sound of Christina Aguilera's amazing singing voice.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: This may surprise you, but I'm gonna give Odette Yustman the Breakout Star of the Year Award. Her performance reminded me of early Rachel McAdams, and we've all seen what she's been able to do since then.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Bottom line, Kristen Bell's agent should not have let her do this role. It makes her look less attractive than her buzz claims her to be, and after When in Rome, it's the second in a line of not very good romantic comedies, she's been expected to hold up. Granted, this one is a chef d'oeuvre in comparison.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Andy Fickman's work hearkens back to absolutely nothing you'd remember having watched.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Think Mean Girls: the Sequel, 10, 30, and 50 years later (keeping in mind that sequels are rarely as good as their originals). High school is over, but those old traumatic memories linger on... which is why it's a good policy to be stoned throughout high school. Take my word for it, you won't remember anything that happened!

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Is The Rock having a hard time getting hired these days? This movie has, like, the third single-scene cameo I've seen him play recently.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/you-again/38333/trailers

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Life as We Know It

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A man (Josh Duhamel) and woman (Kathrine Heigl), who barely tolerate each other, are thrown together to raise a child, after their best friends die, leaving behind a newborn orphan girl.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Katherine Heigl, Josh Duhamel, Josh Lucas, Alexis Clagett, Brynn Clagett, Brooke Clagett, Hayes MacArthur, Christina Hendricks, Sarah Burns, Melissa McCarthy, Britt Flatmo, Jessica St. Clair, Rob Huebel, Andrew Daly, Bill Brochtrup, Will Sasso, DeRay Davis, Kamail Nanjiani

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. If you feel inclined to see this movie, you will probably enjoy it, despite its predictability, because Katherine Heigl and Josh Duhamel are so damn cute together.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: There are a few good laughs, but Katherine Heigl having poo on her face isn't one of them. That's just gross.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Did you read the plot description? Their best friends die!

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: If I had to pick something in this movie to give an award to, it would definitely have to be the face painting. They are the 3 cutest cats I've ever seen. And in case you forgot this extremely important fact about me: I hate cats.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: In this role, Josh Duhamel is the best, cutest, and most charming he's ever been, and his chemistry with Katherine Heigl may just be worth repeating. He's also very tan for some reason.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The sequence after the best friends die dragged on for me, because after a brief moment of almost crying, I quickly felt emotionally neutral. I know the filmmakers had to get past that death-y part as fast as possible if they were ever going to regain any levity in the premise, but something was missing, as I was never pulled into what they must've been going through in a real way, in my heart.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Even though they supposedly dislike each other, it is clear from the start that this man and woman have a very comfortable and relaxed rapport, so it feels like they're together long before they actually are. This is a problem because once the hatred(ish) is gone between them, the only obstacle they have to overcome is a minor crush that Katherine Heigl's character has on the baby's doctor.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/life-as-we-know-it/38945/trailers

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The Social Network

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: The true story of how Mark Zuckerberg invented--ahem-- stole the idea for Facebook.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Jesse Eisenberg, Andrew Garfield, Justin Timberlake, Armie Hammer, Max Minghella, Rashida Jones, Rooney Mara, Brenda Song

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! Facebook has changed the way we live our lives, so finding out that every person behind its creation is a total a-hole is enlightening-- by which I mean disheartening.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Any time you see a character with such profound sociopathy, it's bound to make you laugh once or twice. I mean, come on, people who can't relate to others are hysterical!

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: It certainly should make cry the good people at MySpace and Friendster. They're probably still scratching their heads as to why Facebook is having so much more success than they are, for providing basically the same service.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Yes. It's the front runner in buzz so far, and why shouldn't it be? When there are no movies out about handicapped people, the next most likely award recipient is always the tortured genius-- probably because being on the brilliant side of retarded is still considered a handicap.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Jesse Eisenberg is perfectly cast as the sort of stuck-up, entitled, Harvard nerd that I've often encountered. Armie Hammer's portrayal of the stuck-up, entitled, Harvard jerk also ressembles my experience of Harvard people. And Andrew Garfield, who constantly gets rave reviews and hot upcoming roles (like Spiderman), is totally not growing on me.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: David Fincher has certainly done more showy movies than this one, which doesn't stand out as having a branded-imprint directing-wise. For this kind of story, though, that's probably a wise choice.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Okay, I know Aaron Sorkin is a genius and all that, but instead of giving him carte blanche, I feel like somebody's gotta point out that nobody talks like that. In particular, I was struck by the fakeness of the first conversation between Mark and his girlfriend, right before she breaks up with him, as well as the introduction of the Winklevoss twins, as they pompously row their crew boat, several boat-lengths ahead of their competitors, calmly discussing how one of them should row forward while the other rows backwards to make it a fair race. Come on!

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/the-social-network/1413499/trailers

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Waiting for "Superman"

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: This documentary explains how the public education system in America sucks the big one.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Aside from a few presidents and Bill Gates, the most famous person in the movie is Ralphie from The Simpsons... because working in education is thankless.

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. The beginning and end focus on compelling stories about actual children who are hurt by having to win a lottery if they ever want to get into a good elementary school and on the path to making something of their lives. But the middle is reminiscent of a Statistics 101 class, which these children will probably not be in school long enough to get to suffer through.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Many of the statistics are demonstrated through cute little animations, which provided me with my biggest laugh. Not so much the animations, but the animators' final credit, which read: "Animation by Awesome and Modest."

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you don't cry in this movie, it's because you hate the childrens.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: President W. Bush makes a cameo appearance that reminds us that whatever elite private school he went to should get an award for giving him an Education Most Like That of a Public School Student. Oh, how I miss getting to hear him talkinating on those podium stands.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: The kids come off like miniature adults... who happen to have no chance at a future worth becoming adults for.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The images created in this movie are proof that just because you're shooting a documentary doesn't mean you have to make it look like crap. Some of the frames Davis Guggenheim discovers could double as wall art. Or at least grace the cover of a Trapper Keeper.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The script has too many numbers in it. I can only handle so many statistics in a row before I start to think about other things. Like cake. And I don't particularly like cake.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Despite anything negative I've said about the entertainment value of this movie, you should still probably see it. Just so you know.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/waiting-for-superman/10024296/video/waiting-for-superman-trailer-no-1/84743779001

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The Freebie

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: The most happily married couple in the world decides that to spice up their sex life, they should each have a one night stand.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Dax Shepard, Katie Aselton, Frankie Shaw, Ross Partridge, Bellamy Young

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! It's short, (bitter)sweet, and to the point.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The cute couple's cute banter would be incredibly funny if you were in the cute relationship. But it's a lot less so for those of us that aren't, which includes everyone. This should serve as a good reminder that all your cute little couple's jokes are really only funny to you, so don't expect me to laugh when you try to explain them to me.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Cheating, even with permission, is a very bad idea. Does that make you cry?

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: This is a truly indy film that deserves to steal some indy film awards away from all those "indy" movies with big stars and name directors, whose budgets are higher than what most people will make in their whole lives.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: I liked Katie Aselton in The Puffy Chair but I loved her in this. And while Dax Shepard can't hold a candle to her, this is a great opportunity for him to showcase his acting in a non-goofball role.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Katie Aselton also directs. She uses the classic indy style of a loose, vaguely swaying camera, along with the very modern zooms in and out, which used to be considered a directing faux-pas, but ever since the rise of digital cameras has become known as a way of saying, "Hey, look how hip I am." It's all been done before, but it serves her purpose nicely here.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The story is told out of order, once in a while, so you find out how it's going to turn, long before it happens. The shift in the time line is used here to create tension in scenes that would otherwise feel redundant and banal. That said, I could've done without some of the happy couple montages. We immediately get that they're happy, so the montages end up seeming like filler trying to lengthen the film to a feature theatrical running time.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Not about the movie, but for those of you who've wondered why I've slacked so much over that last couple of weeks, I did not quit movie blogging, I was on vacation for the first time since I started this site. I'm back though, so check back often, as awards season is upon us, which means lots of movies will be watched.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/the-freebie/10024214/trailers

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