You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: There's this family, and everyone in it is unhappy and wants to cheat on and/or leave their spouse. Uplifting. Oh, yeah, and one of them is seeing a quack psychic.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Gemma Jones, Naomi Watts, Josh Brolin, Anthony Hopkins, Lucy Punch, Freida Pinto, Antonio Banderas, Roger Ashton-Griffiths, Pauline Collins, Ewen Bremner, Christian McKay, Theo James, Fenella Woolgar, Anna Friel, Neil Jackson, Zak Orth

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. Woody Allen's movies often start with a voice over or inscription citing a quote that outright states the theme of the movie, so when the first words of this film's voice over stated that Shakespeare said life was a lot of sound and fury leading up to nothing, I started to worry. And as foretold, the film is exactly that.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The whole "everybody's unhappy, selfish, and wants to cheat" theme is almost too depressing to allow the humor to play.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If this film is anything more than Woody Allen's cynical viewpoint with a touch of aging thrown in, then we should all cry, because life sucks and then, if you're lucky, you die. If you're unlucky, you're reborn and have to go through the Hell of it all over again.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: The French will think of something. They just love that fool.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Josh Brolin put on weight for the role and Anthony Hopkins lost a bunch. I know some people consider that acting.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Woody Allen's style hasn't evolved since the 70s. In 300 years, you would be able to pick up any of his films and recognize his auteurship by the long shots of two people walking and talking in some urban city. The strangest part is that after all these decades, and in all its simplicity, his style still works.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: This story is a good example of why Woody Allen shouldn't try to do one film a year. There are some incredibly clever twists, which lead to nothing, as they are not resolved. Which leaves me with the impression that he knew he hadn't finished the script, but it was time to start shooting if he was gonna make his self-imposed one film a year schedule, so he tagged on the theme of Shakespeare's "A lot of sound and fury amounting to nothing" as an excuse about why he never bothered to resolve the story... Which, I guess, in itself is pretty clever in its own way.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/you-will-meet-a-tall-dark-stranger/38103/trailers

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