Babies

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: This documentary follows four babies from different parts of the world (Namibia, Mongolia, Tokyo, San Francisco) during their first year of life, comparing and contrasting how child rearing in civilized and uncivilized society is completely different and also exactly the same.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Four kids under a year old who already have bigger acting careers than you. And three of them don't even speak English.

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. What I like about this movie (aside from all the cuteness) is the way that without telling us anything, it reminds us that we are animals in nature who function with or without the societies that we create. What some of you may not like, is that in the age of Facebook, you've probably already seen more footage of babies that aren't yours than you can stomach.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Less if you've already seen the previews, but still quite a bit.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but I wouldn't want to be any of of these kids when they get to Junior High. When I was a pre-teen, I remember being embarrassed in front of my friends that my parents had naked baby pictures of me. Not only do these kids have a whole naked theatrical release about them, but two of them poop, one of them discovers his genitals, and one of them throws a temper tantrum over something really dumb.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: We may as well go ahead and give it the Cuteness Award, because babies don't appreciate it when you take that away from them. So far, it's all they've got.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Each child has such a distinct personality and disposition from the start, that it becomes hard to argue against nature's roll in providing us each with a soul and an essence that no one could ever imitate or duplicate.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Heartless. There are times when these babies are getting themselves into potentially perilous situations, and you can't help but wonder how the cameraman can just sit there rolling film, rather than jumping in and saving these poor, helpless things from themselves... Then again, those are the best moments in the film.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Seemingly simple and innocuous, but if you go see it with intelligent people, you will be surprised at how much there is to talk about (and argue about) afterward, both regarding societal norms and the constant learning curve of being human.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Yes. Enjoying life is not about money. We are survivors by nature and can adapt to any conditions. Don't ever forget it.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/babies/50452/trailers

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The Back-up Plan

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A desperate, baby-obsessed woman (Jennifer Lopez), gets artificially inseminated, and then immediately meets the love of her life (Alex O'Loughlin).

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Jennifer Lopez, Alex O'Loughlin, Michaela Watkins, Anthony Anderson, Linda Lavin, Eric Christian Olsen, Noureen DeWulf, Tom Bosley, Danneel Harris, Robert Klein, Melissa McCarthy, Maribeth Monroe, Jennifer Elise Cox

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Stop! This movie could only possibly be enjoyed at an all-girls' slumber party, where everyone is getting drunk on their own individual pint of ice cream. And even then, the ice cream is the only part you'll enjoy.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: If you're Jennifer Lopez, this movie will make you laugh all the way to the bank.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: It makes me cry when I see yet another movie depicting women as crazy, pathetic losers, with illogical mood-swings, who can only think about how they're going to get a baby before they're too old. If I'm supposed to be the audience for this movie, maybe you should try getting on my good side, once in a while, instead of insulting my intelligence.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: The users on imdb are already suggesting it for the Razzies, so what I was gonna say turns out not to be original in the slightest.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: If I ever though Jennifer Lopez was a good actress in the tabloids, this movie is more proof that reality TV stars can't necessarily act. I have rarely seen so much grimacing from a so-called professional actress.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: You know they got a first-time feature director because everyone else passed on the script. But ultimately, Alan Poul's biggest mistake was being the guy desperate enough to say yes.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: I never found out what these two people saw in each other besides their mutual good looks-- which is not the reason given for their deep, instant love, but what else am I left to assume? At the same time, if it weren't for Alex O'Loughlin's hotness, there would be nothing differentiating his approach to J-Lo from stalking. Not only would that be creepy in the real world, but then, the first date he plans is so over-the-top romantic, that you can't help but think that he's up to no good. If they weren't in a movie together, he would just be some random guy she met on the street, who harassed her until she agreed to go out with him, and then took her to a secluded park, where no one could hear her scream-- yikes!

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/the-back-up-plan/38957/trailers

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Taking Woodstock

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: To avoid going broke, a young man (Demetri Martin) agrees to host the Woodstock Music Festival at his parents' motel, and you all know what happened from there.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Demetri Martin, Imelda Staunton, Henry Goodman, Eugene Levy, Emile Hirsch, Paul Dano, Kelli Garner, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Don Fogler, Jonathan Groff, Liev Schreiber, Gabriel Sunday, Mamie Gumer, Kevin Sussman, Adam LeFevre

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. Mostly due to a severe lack of period music, you never get lost in that 1960s feeling that was probably the main reason you chose to attend this movie in the first place.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: For all the silly places my sister, my dad, and I used to tell people they'd reached when they called our home, none of our attempts to be funny when we answered the phone were as hilarious as the way in which Demetri Martin answers the phone, in all seriousness, at his parents' motel.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Only if watching people go from flat broke to rich to richer in seconds flat makes you feel sad for your own insurmountable debt.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Considering the amount of nudity in the film, I was amazed to look around the theater at the vast number of blue hairs in the audience. Then it dawned on me, that these old geezers are about the right age to have actually attended this momentous event. And since the Academy is also made up of old farts, I'm going to assume that they too have a nostalgic affinity for smoking dope, dropping acid, and enjoying free love, and therefore, I'm not going to rule out awards consideration quite as fast as I should.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: I don't know if you've ever seen Imelda Staunton in a film before, but I've seen her in two. And based on that tiny sampling, I would venture to say that everything she does is genius, and she should be doing a lot more of it. She is the highlight of the film, the source of most of the comedy, and in all seriousness, I would be shocked if she didn't win the Best Supporting Actress Academy Award.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Ang Lee puts his artistic mark on the thing, but the pace is over-indulgent and self-important, at the same time. Also, I blame him for this film's greatest shortcoming-- which is the measly 3 recognizable songs on the soundtrack. You see, we know the problem wasn't that the budget was too low to afford more songs, because they had enough money to hire Ang Lee to direct.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: There is a nice story about family at the center of it all, and a few scenes that are particularly special. But the film starts out slow and never reaches the speed limit. So it's like driving behind an old person, and then having to smell them next to you in the theater... Probably sitting in a better seat than you, because they made you late.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/taking-woodstock/34750/trailers

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