Amazon Holiday

Monday, March 28, 2011

Red Riding Hood

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Very loosely based on the fairy tale of the same name, this story of werewolves living amongst us seems to exist almost solely for the purpose of capitalizing on the Twilight phenomenon.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Amanda Seyfried, Gary Oldman, Billy Burke, Shiloh Fernandez, Max Irons, Virginia Madsen, Lukas Haas, Julie Christie, Shauna Kain, Michael Hogan, Adrian Holmes, Cole Heppell, Christine Willes, Michael Shanks, Kacey Rohl

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. What the imitators of Twilight never seem to be able to capture is the one thing that makes the little girls scream: the squirm-inducing sexual tension between the heroes that comes from the fact that they can't have each other, and being teenagers with raging hormones, this means that they will absolutely die if they can't have what they want.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The part where she says, "Grandmother, what big eyes you have" is kind of funny, but not intentionally.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: A lot of people die, so-- no.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Red Riding Hood gets the award for being the first of a slew of lame fairy-tale re-tellings aimed at adults that have become the latest trend in Hollywood. Here's how Hollywood thinks, "What can we make into a movie that has a built in brand, that we don't have to spend money on?" And that's why there is now a Jack in the Beanstalk project in the works, two competing Snow White projects coming your way, and three Peter Pan movies racing to get to the big screen first. And all of them are action adventure films aimed at grown ups, because everyone knows that's who the fairy-tale brand speaks to the loudest... Think about it, Hollywood!

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Shiloh Fernandez is a pleasure to look at, but he lacks the charisma of a Robert Pattinson. I want to give director Hardwicke props for casting her own Twilight discovery, Billy Burke, thus expanding his career, but unfortunately, Burke suffers from the same problem as Fernandez in this piece. Amanda Seyfried, though, pops off the screen effortlessly.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Catherine Hardwicke comes from a background as a set designer, so it comes as no surprise that the art direction in this film is beautiful. She also directed the first Twilight, so it comes as a great surprise that one of the shots in the film looks like it was literally poached from her vampire flick. I know I've seen that shot before, and while it's pretty, I'm not sure you're allowed to reuse your old shots from other movies unless it's part of an inside joke-- which this is clearly not. But, recycled shots or not, the look of this film is definitely its most compelling aspect.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: All of the interesting choices for who the werewolf might turn out to be are too obvious, so the writers are left with the choice to pick someone obvious, or pick someone more random, and either way we're going to be a little disappointed.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: Red Riding Hood Trailer

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