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Showing posts with label wishing fountain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wishing fountain. Show all posts

Sunday, August 7, 2011

The Change-Up


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A married man (Jason Bateman) and a single man (Ryan Reynolds) switch bodies and try not to f-up each other's lives.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Jason Bateman, Ryan Reynolds, Leslie Mann, Olivia Wilde, Alan Arkin, Sydney Rouviere, Mircea Monroe, Grogory Itzin, Ned Schmidtke, Lo Ming, Craig Bierko, Bailey Anne Borders

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketProceed with Caution. If you go to a body-switch movie, and your main complaint is that the set-up and the ending are predictable, then you only have yourself to blame. That's what body-switch movies do. You're supposed to watch a body-switch movie for the second act. That's where you get to find out if the actors where able to transform to the point of making you believe they are inhabited by the other, and it's where you get to see the ways in which they screw up each other's lives while they are inhabiting them. So let's talk about the second act, which isn't anywhere near as bad as the buzz on it. In fact, once it's released on VOD and DVD, I predict that many people will find themselves telling a friend, "You know what I saw last night, that wasn't half bad?"

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Not out loud much, because the writers rely too heavily on swear words instead of humor, and the insulting nicknames the characters lob at each other incessantly quickly begin to feel overbearing and self-conscious.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: What makes me cry most is how all the nerds and haters are so quick to say this movie is the end of the raunchy R-rated comedy being hot. Some of us love comedies, don't consider them a phase but rather a necessity, and don't start screaming about how it's the end of your stupid comic book movies, just because Green Lantern came out and sucked. (Disclaimer: I didn't see it.) Hey, I'm noticing a pattern. Maybe we could all get along if we instead went around screaming that it's the end of Ryan Reynolds?

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I'm giving Judd Apatow a Tolerance Award for letting the mother of his children show her boobs. It takes a truly secure man to be okay with that... Or maybe a truly twisted one. Either way, we should start counting down to their divorce.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Jason Bateman does an amazing job of making you forget that he doesn't actually have Ryan Reynolds inside his body. Ryan Reynolds does an amazing job of making you forget why he's become such a hot commodity.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: David Dobkin directed Wedding Crashers, so my first instinct is never to say anything bad... But. There are several pivotal pissing scenes, where we get full frontal shots, and before you get all grossed out, let me clarify that my complaint is that neither one of these men seems to have a penis. Now I know you can't show that in an R-rated movie, but what I don't know is why the director chose to shoot an angle that makes it so obvious that they're holding little water hoses rigged to come out of their flies. It would have been so easy to use only angles that don't show the pants' opening. The way it is shot, you can't help but peek, and seeing nothing there is disturbing.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: From the writers of The Hangover, comes a film that feels like it's from the writers of an ABC Family Film-- with tits, swearing, and male leads. I think the lesson here is that you shouldn't try to do a body-switch movie for the R-rated audience. It would seem they don't care for the conceit. Oh well, I guess I'd better scrap my plans to write that body-switch movie between a hooker and her pimp.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: The Change-Up Trailer

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Thursday, February 4, 2010

When in Rome


Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A workaholic curator (Kristen Bell), who doesn't believe in love, picks 5 coins out of a fountain of love, in Rome, and is surprised to find the previous owners of those coins (Danny DeVito, Will Arnett, Dax Shepard, Jon Heder, & Josh Duhamel) chasing her around New York, like crazy in love puppy dogs, who will do anything to impress her. Really? Not a single one of the coins that she picked was tossed in by a woman? I find that unlikely.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Kristen Bell, Josh Duhamel, Will Arnett, Danny DeVito, Jon Heder, Dax Shepard, Anjelica Huston, Alexis Dziena, Kate Micucci, Peggy Lipton, Bobby Moynihan, Luca Calvani, Keir O'Donnell, Kristen Schaal, Lee Pace, Judith Malina

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: PhotobucketStop! I might almost have given this a yellow light, only because I know there are people, like my friend Stacy, who have less discriminating taste, and don't mind when a movie has glaring flaws, so long as it's cute. Thankfully, Stacy was with me at this screening, and she hated it. If Stacy doesn't like it, nobody will.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Mostly after you leave the theater, and you challenge yourself to think of a single thing about it that made any logical sense. Not only were the coin tossers all men, they were all American men, who happened to be in Italy that day, and in New York two days later, with a psychic knowledge of Bell's name and whereabouts at any given time.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you cry at cliches, this movie is one... only without the tear-jerking parts.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I'm going to go ahead and give it a Razzie for the hair department. I don't know if they give Razzies for hair, but someone on that set thought it was a good idea to put Kristen Bell's hair in a pony tail at a fancy Italian wedding. Yeah, the kind of pony tail you wear to go jogging, or to brush your teeth.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Kristen Bell acted like a girl who would turn away Josh Duhamel, so that probably took some heavy sense memory work. And Josh Duhamel acted like a wuss, who would come back to a fairly average girl like Bell, no matter how many different ways she rejected him and walked out on him. Since I'm pretty sure he's never experienced anything like that in his real life, I imagine he had to dig pretty deep to figure out what that might feel like, too.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: You almost feel sorry for the director on a piece like this, because where the script is lacking, he has to make it up. Like, for example, when the writers forget to put in the romance, the director has to make up for it with that old standby: the slow motion stare... "Oh," you will think to yourself, "They must be in love at first sight now!"

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It really would've been nice if there were even one single moment based in some kind of reality. One believable thing sprinkled in... Or maybe at least a joke once in while. Is that too much to ask?

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/when-in-rome/33121/trailers

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