Drive

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A driver for stunts, robberies, and racing (Ryan Gosling) meets a girl he likes (Carey Mulligan), but her husband (Oscar Issac) gets him into trouble with the mob.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Ryan Gosling, Carey Mulligan, Bryan Cranston, Albert Brooks, Oscar Isaac, Ron Perlman, Christina Hendricks, Kaden Leos

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution.Personally, I hated this movie despite its handful of interesting moments and artistic choices. I struggled to stay awake for the first half--a romantic drama-- and then struggled to justify how the tone of the second half--a gory, B-movie-style, mob thriller-- had anything to do with the first half. But I'm still going to recommend it to anyone who enjoyed No Country for Old Men, because clearly you people find characters who can kill in cold blood without thinking twice charming.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Mostly at the positive buzz it's been getting.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Mostly at the positive buzz it's been getting.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Probably. Which will be followed closely by me swearing at my TV.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Ryan Gosling is an extremely interesting and complex actor, even in the role of an empty vessel who hardly says anything and has no definable character traits besides the fact that he is a great driver, and has virtually no friends, family or confidants of any kind in his life. Without his performance, which brings just enough texture to confuse you into thinking that there might be something to this guy, this movie would be nothing more than B-level thriller looking for foreign DVD distribution at the AFM. (Definition AFM: American Film Market-- notorious place for selling action-thrillers with big stars to foreign markets because American companies weren't stupid enough to pick them up for distribution.)

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Bordering on pretentious, Nicolas Winding Refn, who is currently the hottest thing going in Hollywood, forces you at every turn to notice his directing work, with his constant use of reflections, shadows, and extreme angles. In fact, you will be thinking more about his work than about the story-- which may be a good thing for the story.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Never before has a screenwriter set us up so perfectly for a prequel. Hossein Amini gives us so little about the main character's backstory that you leave the film wondering where he came from, how he was raised, and basically what in his life makes him someone who can kill another human being so effortlessly and accurately on the drop of a dime. There are enough questions about who this talented murderer with a heart of gold is to fill an entire movie setting this one up. And the lack of dialogue, which is obviously supposed to be artistic, is completely unrealistic-- especially when it comes to the woman character.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: The blood looks like Karo syrup with red food coloring #3 in it. The kind used in amateur horror movies. Not the kind used in Ryan Gosling/Carey Mulligan films. Just embarrassing.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: Drive Trailer

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Your Highness

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Two princes, one noble (James Franco) and one a slacker (Danny McBride), go on a quest to save a fair maiden (Zooey Deschanel) from an evil wizard (Justin Theroux), who plans to take over the world with the power he will gain by de-virginizing/raping her when the two moons meet.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Danny McBride, James Franco, Rasmus Hardiker, Natalie Portman, Zooey Deschanel, Justin Theroux, Toby Jones, Damian Lewis, Charles Dance

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Stop! I read a speculative headline today that asked, "Did Your Highness' box office suffer because James Franco bombed at the Oscars?" The writer of this article obviously has not seen this movie, or he would know that the reason this movie suffers is because it's very ill. By which I mean sick. By which I mean awful. But it may actually be so bad that it's good.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Not at first, but after a while, when you get past the shock and denial of how terrible all of it is, you may start to giggle that this is actually happening. You are actually watching this. You actually spent money on the ticket. And they actually just said that.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: "Disturb" is a more accurate description of the emotion it elicits.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: They get the I Beat the MPAA Award. How they avoided an NC17 rating with the extended full frontal shots of a Minotaur's boner, is beyond me.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Natalie Portman's presence in this film reminds me of that time when Sandra Bullock won the Oscar and the Razzie in the same day. Only difference is Natalie is so good in this atrocity that it really makes you wonder if when she signed up to be in it, she wasn't convinced that anyone was actually going to like Black Swan.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: If you want to think David Gordon Green is a good director, you should see Pineapple Express. If you want to think he's a crappy director, you should see this.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: This is one of the scripts where you know it was hatched because a bunch of guys were sitting around, probably getting loaded, and throwing out hilarious "What ifs." The conversation most likely went something like this: "What if you were on a quest, and when you got to the wise man he was a freaky looking alien?" "Yeah! And what if he were a perv, too, who makes you blow him for information." "That's hilarious! And what if he had molested you, when you were young, but you don't realize it, cuz when kids get molested, they don't know that there's anything wrong with it." Crickets.... "That's really weird... We should definitely put that in!" The thing is, some what ifs make good movies and some what ifs make funny conversations that you should never admit to having been a part of.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: Your Highness Trailer

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Super

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A man's (Rainn Wilson) wife (Liv Tyler) leaves him for a drug kingpin (Kevin Bacon), and convinced that she was kidnapped, and didn't leave voluntarily, he decides to become a superhero, donning a costume and going after bad guys, until he is ready to go after the kingpin who stole his wife.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Rainn Wilson, Ellen Page, Liv Tyler, Kevin Bacon, Gregg Henry, Michael Rooker, Andre Royo, Sean Gunn, Stephen Blackehart, Don Mac, Linda Cardellini, Nathan Fillion

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Stop! Go see Kick-Ass instead.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: If you are sick and twisted... but not in the good way.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: I felt sad for them that they came out after Kick-Ass. I also felt sad for all the A-list actors who signed up to be in a film so amateurish.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: There are a handful of nerds who will shower this with blogger awards because the character is so pathetic, he will make anybody feel better about themselves.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: I have honestly never seen Ellen Page or Kevin Bacon do anything I didn't like... until now.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: James Gunn should invest in a cinematographer. The whole thing looks like it was made for twenty bucks. And the wanna-be Scott Pilgrim vs. the World graphics have already been done in Scott Pilgrim vs. the World.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Dark, dark, dark comedy. This is the first time I've truly contemplated the age old question of whether superheroes are actually the bad guys posing as good guys. In this story the heroes show no remorse about killing anybody, and in fact, often take great pleasure in it.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: I went to pre-school with a guy named Super, and he was weird, too.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: Super Trailer

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