The Illusionist

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A failing Parisian Illusionist travels to Scotland to find work and accidentally picks up a poor young stowaway, who turns out to be something of a gold-digger, which forces our aging Illusionist to find increasingly more degrading ways to make money in order to buy her things.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: It's animated and the sparse words spoken in the piece are deliberately incomprehensible, even to people who think they understand French and English.

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. It's highly artistic and aimed at the thinking crowd.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Sure, if you like to laugh at things you have to think about first.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: The ending is pretty depressing... But also goes without saying. I mean, what was he thinking would happen?!

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It's nominated for an Oscar for Best Animated Feature. Too bad it's up against the very best film of the year, Toy Story 3.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: I can honestly say that there isn't any.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The animation of the scenery is beautiful. It makes you want to go to Edinburgh. Speaking of which, if any of you wants to go there, I have a friend who's producing a series of one-man/one-woman shows at the Edinburgh Theater Festival, and she's still looking for some acts for this year, so if you have a completed piece, let me know in the comments section.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It's based on an unproduced script written by the late French actor and icon, Jacques Tati. While alive, Tati was one of France's most famous movie stars. In fact, he still is, despite having passed almost 30 years ago. My point is that this is not a man who had any trouble getting a movie made if he wanted to, so if this script remained unproduced there's probably a reason for that. I'm just sayin'.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: The Illusionist Trailer

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You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: There's this family, and everyone in it is unhappy and wants to cheat on and/or leave their spouse. Uplifting. Oh, yeah, and one of them is seeing a quack psychic.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Gemma Jones, Naomi Watts, Josh Brolin, Anthony Hopkins, Lucy Punch, Freida Pinto, Antonio Banderas, Roger Ashton-Griffiths, Pauline Collins, Ewen Bremner, Christian McKay, Theo James, Fenella Woolgar, Anna Friel, Neil Jackson, Zak Orth

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. Woody Allen's movies often start with a voice over or inscription citing a quote that outright states the theme of the movie, so when the first words of this film's voice over stated that Shakespeare said life was a lot of sound and fury leading up to nothing, I started to worry. And as foretold, the film is exactly that.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The whole "everybody's unhappy, selfish, and wants to cheat" theme is almost too depressing to allow the humor to play.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If this film is anything more than Woody Allen's cynical viewpoint with a touch of aging thrown in, then we should all cry, because life sucks and then, if you're lucky, you die. If you're unlucky, you're reborn and have to go through the Hell of it all over again.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: The French will think of something. They just love that fool.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Josh Brolin put on weight for the role and Anthony Hopkins lost a bunch. I know some people consider that acting.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Woody Allen's style hasn't evolved since the 70s. In 300 years, you would be able to pick up any of his films and recognize his auteurship by the long shots of two people walking and talking in some urban city. The strangest part is that after all these decades, and in all its simplicity, his style still works.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: This story is a good example of why Woody Allen shouldn't try to do one film a year. There are some incredibly clever twists, which lead to nothing, as they are not resolved. Which leaves me with the impression that he knew he hadn't finished the script, but it was time to start shooting if he was gonna make his self-imposed one film a year schedule, so he tagged on the theme of Shakespeare's "A lot of sound and fury amounting to nothing" as an excuse about why he never bothered to resolve the story... Which, I guess, in itself is pretty clever in its own way.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/you-will-meet-a-tall-dark-stranger/38103/trailers

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Just Wright

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A physical therapist (Queen Latifah) meets the star player of The Nets basketball team (Common), but then her God-sister (Paula Patton) claims him, until he gets injured and needs the help of a good PT.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Queen Latifah, Common, Paula Patton, James Pickens Jr., Phylicia Rashad, Pam Grier, Laz Alonso, Mehcad Brooks, Michael Landes, Dwight Howard, Dwayne Wade, Rashard Lewis, Bobby Simmons Jr., Jalen Rose, Rajon Rondo, Marv Albert, Elton Brand, Terence Blanchard, Tim Walsh, Rod Thorn, Loe Ehrline, J.J. Thorn

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. Just Wright probably should've been called "Just Pwedictable." I mean, so long as we're adding superfluous "W"s and talking like Elmer Fudd, wright?

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: It's cwute enough to make you smiwel.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Pwobably a wittle, if youwe a womantic like me.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I'll tell you what it won't win: a spelling bee.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Paula Patton proved she was boring in Precious, and in Just Wright she's Just Wrong (spelled correctly). The character is hateable, but her acting makes it worse. Common masterfully differentiates his feelings for the women with a sly smile for the girl he wants to sleep with, as opposed to the sincere smile he gives the girl he wants to be friends with. And Latifah has charm oozing out of every pore.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: My friend, Aaron, really liked the way the director showed just the right amount of basketball for a chick flick, and showcased a baller's house without making him or it look ostentatious, or over-the-top ornate to the point of gaudiness, "Like they usually do." Personally, I didn't notice anything out of the ordinary about the directing, except during passage of time montages, where Sanaa Hamri used little overlapping boxes of action to move through time faster. But I've seen that before.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It starts out poorly, but gradually improves as the romance builds in a very real way, and the awfullest of awful characters (Paula Patton) starts to fall by the way side. And it's a good thing she kind of disappears from the script because she is selfish to the point that you start to lose respect for Queen Latifah for continuing to be friends with her.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/just-wright/10024795/trailers

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