Body of Lies

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A CIA operative in the Middle East (Leonardo DiCaprio) tries to take down the head of a terrorist cell, but his biggest challenge is figuring out which of his allies he can trust.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Leonardo DiCaprio, Russell Crowe, Mark Strong, Goldshifteh Farahani, Oscar Isaac, Ali Suliman, Alon Aboutboul, Simon McBurney, Kais Nashif

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. Nearly as difficult to follow as Syriana, and not necessarily as fresh or interesting. If you go to the movies to escape or check out, you won't be able to do that here, as you have to pay attention every moment, and think to follow-- or you can do what I did, and cat nap when your brain starts to hurt. Okay, so I didn't like it very much, but that doesn't mean you won't. I mean, I'd be hard pressed to find a woman who enjoys this. But if you're a guy, and you like to watch guns and blood and war and things blowing up and sand-- this is whatever the male equivalent of a "Chick Flick" would be called. "A Him Flim?" "A Guy High?" (Feel free to submit better suggestions, so we can finally have a derogatory term for movies that alienate women.)

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: I laughed really hard once at a poorly framed shot of a guy in a suit standing in front of a fountain with his legs open. Completely unintentionally, the water was spurting up and down between his legs, making him look like he's either peeing through his suit or standing over a bidet, washing his rear. That was my favorite part of the movie. I like to laugh.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but it will give you a sense of hopelessness about the war on terror. Our plan to fight terror with terror doesn't work. For every terrorist you kill, at least 10 new vengeful ones sprout up like the water fountain between that guy's legs. We need a new strategy-- and how! So if you have any suggestions, please post them on Facebook.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I liked the song that played over the closing credits... or maybe I was just happy the movie was over.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Russell Crowe plays a caricature of a bad guy. He's cold, he doesn't care about anyone, and we don't care about him. Leonardo DiCaprio's performance is fine, but his character is like an automaton: he does what he's told-- and he has integrity, too! Every character in the film feels like an object, only put there to accomplish a goal. None of them offer anything compelling for the audience to relate to, latch on to, or care about.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Ridley Scott sure does like to blow things up and shoot people dead. Hey, why shouldn't he? He's damn good at it!

Q: How is the story/script?

A: This story has no emotional through line. I don't know about you, but I remember things whether in conversation, in movies, or in life, by how a moment made me feel. Without feelings, you only have the words to remember things by. So in this movie I tried to pay attention to the words, and I tried to retain them so that I could recall them later when I would need them again... but I couldn't.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: If you want to see a great thriller about the clusterf**k we've gotten ourselves into in the Middle East, go see Traitor with Don Cheadle. It's smart, it's emotional, and it's a much clearer demonstration of the ambiguities between good guys and bad guys, when it comes to us and them. Here's a link to my review:
http://moviereviewfaqs.blogspot.com/2008/08/traitor.html

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The Secret Life of Bees

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: In 1964, a teenage girl (Dakota Fanning) runs away from home with her Black nanny (Jennifer Hudson), to follow a path that she hopes will lead to learning more about her dead mother. During these racially charged times, these interracial friends are taken in by a family of Black women who make and sell honey.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Dakota Fanning, Queen Latifah, Jennifer Hudson, Alicia Keys, Sophie Okonedo, Paul Bettany, Tristan Wilds, Hilarie Burton, Nate Parker

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! If you like culturally relevant dramas that explore the many shades of what it is to give and receive love, this is the one for you.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Here and there, it's very rare. Dramas just don't care. Laughter is meant to be shared.
(If you noticed that was a Haiku, You Are Smarter Than a Fifth Grader, and you should audition here: http://www.fox.com/areyousmarter/showinfo/)

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Well, first off, there's a montage to a song called, "Beautiful," by India.Arie that always makes me cry-- so that's cheating. But before all is said and done, the film itself also manages to earn a few of your tears.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Sophie Okonedo has a good chance of getting a nod for Best Supporting Actress, because she plays a somewhat mentally handicapped person. In fact, she has just the right amount of mental handicap to win an Oscar, if you follow the lore explained in Tropic Thunder-- which I do.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: How is Dakota Fanning a child actress? She's such a consummate professional that it's hard to imagine she's only 14. And watch-out world, she's growing up fast now, kissing boys on screen, and as soon as she starts wearing make-up, she's going to be as much of a knockout as Heather Locklear in the 80s. Jennifer Hudson and Alicia Keys are passable, but they don't quite hold their own next to Queen Latifah's strength and charisma, or Sophie Okonedo's conviction and depth of character.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Aside from a few pacing problems where things could've been tightened up, there's nothing particularly wrong with the directing, but at times it is all too clear how often the director has worked in television.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Spike Lee could take some lessons from Gina Prince-Bythewood on how to confront racism in a manner that's relevant and compelling.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: You should know going in that Queen Latifah's character is supposed to be in her upper forties or lower fifties. Without that information, certain scenes may be confusing.

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Happy-Go-Lucky

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A few weeks in the life of Poppy (Sally Hawkins), a grade school teacher who can find the humor in just about anything, including having her bike stolen, a flamenco teacher on the edge of a nervous breakdown, and a driving instructor who hates just about anything that is set in his path.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Sally Hawkins, Eddie Marsan, Alexis Zegerman, Samuel Roukin, Karina Fernandez, Sinead Matthews, Kate O'Flynn, Caroline Martin, Oliver Maltman, Jack MacGeachin

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. A lot of memorable scenes and interesting characters populate this movie, which hasn't much more direction than a slice of your own life.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The laughs are very British, but there's plenty of them.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you're the type of person who gets irritated at people who are always in a good mood, it could stir up some negative feelings in you. Some might call it annoyance, some might call it resentment, I call it jealousy.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Following her Best Actress Award at the Berlin International Film Festival, Sally Hawkins will most likely be considered for both the Oscar and the BAFTA. It's also worth mentioning that the film itself has earned Mike Leigh an Award in Norway which has the cutest name I've ever heard: "Most Enjoyable Film-- Bringer of Joy Award." I'm not making that up.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Delightful. Sally Hawkins is mesmerizing in all her optimism, as she laughs her way through life, making adorable little happy sounds at everything the world has to offer. On the other extreme, Eddie Marsan is perfect as her bitter and angry driving instructor whose every emotion is expressed by yelling. And Karina Fernandez, in a small role, as the Spanish flamenco teacher, delivers several hilarious monologues that acting students looking for original material should probably steal to perform for their classes.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: If you happen to be a Mike Leigh fan, you may be disappointed that this film veers so severely away from his usually morbidly depressing type characters and themes, and instead examines how easy it can be to maintain an upbeat attitude in the face of all that is wrong with people and the world.

Technically, he doesn't let the fact that this is a small film stop him from going out of his way to add artistry to his shots. In particular you may notice his masterful use of foreground extras to add depth, as well as several shots taken from a bird's eye view, that could be framed and shown in a photography gallery.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Very European. The individual scenes are often dramatic, real, and very well played, but neither the main character nor the storyline seem to have any goals, so you're not sure what you're watching for. On a more specific note, there's one scene that literally comes out of nowhere and goes nowhere, as Poppy approaches a homeless man for no apparent reason, and even after he proves to be potentially violent, she sticks around to have what is certainly an interesting and cleverly written conversation, but is in no way believable, necessary, or sane.

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Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Nick (Michael Cera), a heartbroken teen, finally leaves his house to go see his favorite band, and that's when he meets Norah (Kat Dennings), a girl with exactly the same taste in music as him. The rest goes without saying, since in high school, that's all you need to have in common with someone in order to realize that they're you're destiny.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Michael Cera, Kat Dennings, Alexis Dziena, Aaron Yoo, Rafi Garvon, Ari Graynor, Jonathan Bradford Wright, Zachary Booth, Jay Baruchel, Seth Meyers, Kevin Corrigan, John Cho, Eddie Kaye Thomas, Devendra Banhart

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. If not for Michael Cera's undeniable charm and Kat Dennings' ability to fill run of the mill dialogue with palpable teenage angst, this story would not be worth the film it was printed on... Then again, film is expensive, so take that however you will.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: It plays more like a drama, but if you pay very close attention, you will find a fair amount of laughs.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but you may never be able to chew gum the same way again.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Clearly they're trying to sell the soundtrack, so they may campaign for music noms. But ultimately, I don't think the film is important enough to get noticed, even for the little things.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Michael Cera and Kat Dennings can pull tears from a stone, but the writing of their characters is very surface, and the writing for the rest of the characters is much worse.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: With almost the entire film taking place in one night, the director was faced with the challenge of creating light in the dark. Sometimes he succeeds, sometimes he casts Seth Meyers of SNL in a tiny little cameo, and you can't see his face.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Mostly lacking in conflict. There's just not enough stopping the two leads from getting together, so there is very little suspense as to how things are going to go.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: My friend Valerie suggests that if you like clever banter about music, instead of seeing this, you should rent High Fidelity.

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Synecdoche, New York

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A theater director (Philip Seymour Hoffman), whose life starts out fairly normal (bad marriage and a kid), gets a chance to direct his life's work-- quite literally-- as the play gradually becomes a metaphor of his own life examination, and at the same time a carbon copy of his life experiences. The project takes the rest of his life to complete, as he's constantly trying to figure his life out, although it's ambiguous enough that at certain points you wonder if he's already dead... I don't know, it's Charlie Kaufman.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Philip Seymour Hoffman, Samantha Morton, Michelle Williams, Catherine Keener, Emily Watson, Dianne Wiest, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Hope Davis, Tom Noonan, Sadie Goldstein, Paul Sparks, Daisy Tahan, Robin Weigert

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. Don't go to this movie if you're one of those people who likes to understand what's going on. And if you do go, bring a friend, preferably one who likes psychoanalyzing poetry and extracting from it esoteric innuendo. You'll need that someone there to discuss it with you (read: explain) afterward.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: If not for Charlie Kaufman's offbeat brand of humor, this would be a David Lynch movie.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but it may move your mind. Sometimes to boredom, sometimes to confusion, and sometimes to insight-- or a headache.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Kaufman is the only person in Hollywood who's allowed to do anything original... so probably.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Emma Watson plays Samantha Morton, and you literally don't know which is the real one and which is the fake at times. As for the rest, if I may refer you to the list of talent under FAQ #2, you'll rightly presume that everyone else is great, too.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Charlie Kaufman directs from his own script, and it still looks like a Charlie Kaufman film. Unfortunately, I think it's less strong than some of his previous scripts, most likely due to the lack of an outside eye/director cutting and shaping the insanity into more comprehensible terms for those of us who don't live inside Kaufman's mind.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: I sat through a Q & A to find out just that, and what I learned is that Kaufman himself isn't quite sure what it's about. It conveys certain ideas about life, or dream-states, or maybe after-life, or stream of consciousness... all of which you won't be tested on.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Cleavage. Lots of it. But not the perky kind, either. More like the fleshy kind. In any case, I think our award winning screenwriter may be a breast man.

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Religulous

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Bill Maher documents his trip to many of the most sacred and religiously meaningful places in the world, as he interviews high and low level participants of all denominations, in various religions, about why they believe what's written in the storybooks.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Jesus, Mary, Joseph Smith, Allah, Moses, Xenu... and his Holiness: Bill Maher.

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. People of faith will be offended by this film, while atheists, agnostics, intellectuals, and people with a sense of humor will worship it.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Jonah Hill (of Superbad, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and Knocked up) gives his funniest line reading of the year. And that's not all.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but you might start talking in tongues. Praise be Jesus.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: That depends on if Maher's God is a vengeful one or not.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Some of Bill Maher's reaction shots are priceless. One of them is the biggest laugh in the movie. And man, is that guy quick!

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The directing looks un-thought out and amateurish. Both the second camera and the boom mics regularly find themselves in the shots.  And while I can't imagine what Larry Charles was thinking when he put his B-Camera on a profile shot of Bill Maher, (causing him to regularly discuss the issues with the right side of the screen), I'm pretty sure I know what he was thinking when he got to the editing room: "Why on Earth did I put my B-Camera on such a stupid, ugly angle?!... I guess God is punishing me for making this film."

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It's kind of like Borat, but instead of an ignorant guy pointing out how stupid Americans are, it's a guy who's too smart for his own good pointing out how stupid devout people are. In other words, it's way more controversial. And sometimes, it's so intellectually mind-bending that your head starts to puff up as if it's about to explode.

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Miracle at St. Anna

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: When a bank teller in New York mysteriously shoots a customer, a priceless Italian statue head is found in his apartment. Then, when a newspaper man (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) goes to interview him about it, we flashback to World War II to learn about what it was like to be a Black soldier fighting the Germans in Italy on behalf of the United States.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Derek Luke, Michael Ealy, Laz Alonso, Omar Benson Miller, Valentina Cervi, Matteo Sciabordi, Pierfrancesco Favino, John Turturro, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, John Leguizamo, Kerry Washington, D.B. Sweeney, Omero Antonutti, Sergio Albelli

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Stop! Spike Lee seems to use every film as a platform to rant on about racism. To which I say, either think of something new to say on the matter or become a preacher! When you constantly accuse White people of being born and bred to be racists against Blacks, all you do is unite Black people in a common (unfounded) hatred of all Whites across the world. Which, first of all, makes you, Spike Lee, look ignorant. And second of all, it doesn't acknowledge the great strides that have been made toward progress-- like, for example, I don't know, that a Black person is probably going to be our next president! Oh, and I almost forgot to mention: your film meanders without focus, or a plot, and it's 2 1/2 boring hours long. Get off your pedestal and learn to tell interesting stories-- it is what they pay you (a lot more than 40 Acres and a Mule) to do.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: One of the characters is given a funny nickname by a young Italian boy with a vivid imagination. I would tell you what it is (since you're not going to see this movie anyway), but without the visual of how massive this actor is, "My Chocolate Giant" doesn't sound all that clever.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: The ending is moving. Unfortunately, you'd have to sit through the rest of the film to find that out. And since you know better than to do that, I don't see how it can make you cry.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It pains me to even consider the question.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: The acting is fine. But ask me to tell you who the main character is supposed to be, or whose point of view the story is told from, and my answer would look something like: ???!#@??

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Since the movie takes place mostly in Italy, it can't help but be beautiful. But if Spike Lee had done his job, and cut out the parts that don't advance the story, the film would only be long enough to distribute on Youtube.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It starts out with an interesting mystery, and then we flashback 40 years and watch soldiers doing God knows what, because God knows why, for about two hours. And even though the ending is sweet, if you think about it for more than a few seconds you start to realize how many of its elements could never happen without massive amounts of coincidence and unlikely happenstance.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: The score seemed to be pulled from a 1940 film, which is an interesting choice. But maybe I wouldn't have been listening to it so much, if I had felt like paying attention to the movie.

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Battle in Seattle

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A fictional retelling of true events, Battle in Seattle follows an organized group of peaceful rioters, as they stand in protest with tens of thousands of other, against the World Trade Organization, which is meeting in their hometown for five days. Unfortunately, when the police begin attacking them, things don't stay peaceful for long.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Martin Henderson, Michelle Rodriguez, Woody Harrelson, Charlize Theron, Andre Benjamin, Ray Liotta, Rade Serbedzija, Joshua Jackson, Connie Nielsen, Channing Tatum, Jennifer Carpenter, Ivana Milicevic, Isaach De Bankole, Tzi Ma

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! Selfishly, I want to send you all to this movie just in case you don't already know what the WTO is doing to put commercialism ahead of both the individual human being and the environment that sustains us. Not only that, but certain heretofore unnamed world powers within the World Trade Organization (take a lucky guess who) use their position to suppress the rights of Third World countries, keeping them in a constant state of bankruptcy, which in comparison, makes our own financial crisis seem not so bad. So please take my impure intentions into consideration before you rush out to see this one. But do me a favor, if you decide to skip it, at least try to do a little personal research on the WTO.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Andre 3000 has a couple of funny moments. But none of them are quite as funny as the fact that he has a four digit number in his name.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: You'll probably cry more by doing your research on the World Trade Organization-- another well intentioned group, turned evil in the face of greed.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: After the film, I sat through the first 5 minutes of a Q & A with writer-director, Stuart Townsend, during which he mentioned that they're releasing the film now because it's, "After the Summer Blockbuster season and before Awards Season." So clearly they're not expecting any.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: If you can get past Martin Henderson's New Zealand accent coming in and out of his attempt at an American one, and if you can get past Michelle Rodriguez's one-note, angry-at-the-world act, and if you can get past Connie Nielsen's spontaneous turn from caricatured bitch on wheels of a news reporter, who will do anything for a story, to a suddenly compassionate supporter of human rights... Whew-- that's a lot to get past... But my point is Andre Benjamin is delightful in all his optimism, Channing Tatum, in a very small role, gives one of his most naturalistic performances to date, and Rade Serbedzija is spot on-- so long as you can get past the fact that he's playing a French man, but when he gets angry, he curses in his native language: Yugoslavian?

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Stuart Townsend, who's never directed before, does a surprisingly good job of seamlessly interweaving actual documentary footage of the events with newly shot fictional footage, involving his made up characters. He will direct again.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Also during the Q & A, Townsend mentioned that his objective was to inspire audiences to demonstrate, and to anger people into action. While I was angered, I left the theater feeling more hopeless about the individual's ability to make a difference, than I felt inspired to try it. On the other hand, it's sad that it took an Irishman to stand up and make a statement about an American historical event, that most of us here aren't even thinking about... So maybe I should at least be inspired by him.

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Ghost Town

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Due to a mishap during a colon operation, dentist Bertram Pincus (Ricky Gervais) dies for 7 minutes. Now he can see dead people, and they all want his help resolving their unfinished business, so they can cross over.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Ricky Gervais, Tea Leoni, Greg Kinnear, Billy Campbell, Aasif Mandvi, Kristen Wiig, Alan Ruck, Dana Ivey, Bridget Moloney, Michael-Leon Wooley

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! Even though it's exactly what you'd expect it to be, and you've probably seen something like it before, you will leave the theater smiling. And that's just generally good for all the people who have to look at you.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: It's starring Ricky Gervais... Of course it will!

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Could do...

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: No, but some people in my theater applauded at the end. Which was surprising, because usually people only clap at the end of pretentious movies... Of course, the clappers soon got embarrassed, and stopped. After which several other people laughed at them. But secretly, I'm pretty sure they wanted to clap, too.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Ricky Gervais is delightful as a "MILH"-- Misanthrope I'd Like to Hug. Nobody can play a hatable jerk in more lovable manner. And Tea Leoni is one of the most talented and underused comedy actresses in Hollywood. Please go see her funny movies, so they'll give her more of 'em.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: There are a couple of moments in the middle of the second act that could be tightened to keep the pace rolling. But considering he's never directed a comedy before, David Koepp does a decent job of making sure all the laughs are on the screen. And that's a skill that sounds easier than it is.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The setup has a giant "buy," where you are forced to accept that Gervais' character will talk to Greg Kinnear but not to any of the other dead people. The only justifiable reason for this seems to be that Greg Kinnear is the famous guy with the lead role. But if you can overlook that little hiccup, the script goes on to skillfully walk a fine line of on-going double-entendres, which make Gervais' regularly insensitive comments come off as charmingly funny to Tea Leoni's character-- and you totally buy that she would hear the humor in them rather than the bitter place they're actually coming from. This especially difficult task is accomplished not once, but in several long sequence. They were lucky they got Ricky Gervais, or it might not have worked out so well for them.

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Appaloosa

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A couple of peace enforcers (Ed Harris & Viggo Mortensen) try to maintain the law in Appaloosa, which is being overrun by a bullying scoundrel (Jeremy Irons). But at its core, it's really just another movie about how women ruin everything (Renee Zellweger).

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Ed Harris, Viggo Mortensen, Jeremy Irons, Renee Zellweger, Cerris Morgan-Moyer, Timothy Spall, Gabriel Marantz, Lance Henriksen, Adam Nelson

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. It's predictable, a trifle, and without moral dilemma. To quote my friend Matthew, "People with undiscerning taste will enjoy this movie." So, go ahead. Like this movie. I dare you.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Some people in my theater were laughing, but I'm not sure why.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Cowboys ain't supposed to cry. (1977 Country & Western reference, anyone?)

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Seeing this film get any recognition, besides for Cinematography, would be a disappointment.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Viggo Mortensen is always perfect, but he usually picks more interesting roles. Jeremy Irons is reminiscent of Daniel Day Lewis in There Will Be Blood, so that's probably a good thing. Ed Harris, who also directs himself, gives a textured and appropriately deadpan performance. But Renee Zellweger and her fat face make you wince the moment she appears on the screen. Not because she's such an awful actress, just because she's so unpleasant to look at, with her squinty eyes and her fake smile, and her anorexic body, which miraculously holds up her giant head. Perhaps I would be less annoyed with her physical appearance if she stopped getting cast as some kind of beauty queen, that men are willing to die over. I mean, I can only suspend disbelief so much for one movie.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Ed Harris' composition and Dean Semler's cinematography are the highlights of what this film has to offer. But Harris' pacing is so slow and monotonous that you find yourself tapping your feet impatiently, as you wait for something-- anything-- exciting to happen.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The conflict level is very light. There's a little, but most of it is predictable, as the writers often take the easy way out of each difficult situation. The main character is too accepting, so he doesn't get angry and retaliate when bad things are done to him. It's a character choice, but it's not a compelling one. And while they tried to justify his blind love for his undeserving wife by explaining that she, "Takes a bath every night," and "Keeps herself clean," you don't buy that he would be so forgiving of a woman who acts the way she does, and looks like Renee Zellweger, to boot.

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Rachel Getting Married

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A recovering addict (Anne Hathaway) comes home from rehab for her sister Rachel's (Rosemarie DeWitt) wedding, and has trouble coping with the fact that all the attention is focused on her sister's joyous day, instead of where it usually is: on her own problems.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Anne Hathaway, Rosemarie DeWitt, Bill Irwin, Debrah Winger, Mather Zickel, Anna Deavere Smith, Tunde Adibimpe, Anisa George

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Stop! This movie is like sitting through a 5 day long wedding (in real time), where you don't know anyone, you don't care about anyone, and the one person you recognize is a completely narcissistic a-hole. Oh, yeah, and because you're actually sitting in a theater, you're not even drunk.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: It's got a few guffaws in the first fifteen minutes, but then you lose interest and stop paying attention.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you find anything to sympathize with in this movie, it's probably because your family dysfunction is similar to theirs, in which case you would have something to cry about. But not necessarily while watching this film.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I hated it in just the right way for the "mainstream" critics and the Independent Spirit nominators to love it.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: If it weren't for Anne Hathaway's celebrity status, you would think the whole thing was actually unfolding in front of your eyes-- it's that real. Rosemarie DeWitt is natural and organic, and it's hard to remember that she's not Anne Hathaway's sister in real life. Since this review is such a major pan, I'd like to take some extra care to point out that that was a compliment for the acting.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: You know when an old pro, with a couple dozen films to his name, decides to pick up a hand-held dv cam, and pretend he's a first time director? It's like that.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Jenny Lumet is the daughter of Sidney Lumet, so God only knows how she got her big break in Hollywood with this, her first outing. I imagine she worked hard, learned her chosen skill, and persisted through all the rejection and heartache... Or more likely, she wrote a first draft, with a couple of good scenes, and when she realized she only had about 25 minutes worth of story, she filled in the rest with pointless wedding speeches, guests performing for the bride and groom, and extended dance sequences at the wedding reception. After which, she had her dad call in some favors, and got herself a movie deal... Did I mention that there's a 7 minute scene where the dad and the groom-to-be compete (in all seriousness) in a competition to see who can load the dishwasher faster? Yeah.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: In this Connecticut wedding, a Black man marries a White woman in a ceremony where everyone wears full (dot) Indian wedding regalia, for no apparent reason, and without comment. Their attire has you so confused, that you almost forget to notice the other gaping discrepancy, which is: there ain't never been a Black person in Connecticut!

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Choke

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A sex-addict (Sam Rockwell) tries to cope with his mother (Anjelica Huston), who is hospitalized with dementia, and has raised him from a place of utter craziness.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Sam Rockwell, Anjelica Huston, Jonah Bobo, Kelly Macdonald, Brad William Henke, Gillian Jacobs, Bijou Phillips, Clark Gregg, Paz de la Huerta, Joel Grey, Heather Burns

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. While the film is being marketed as a story about a man who fakes choking on food in restaurants, so that the strangers who save him will send him empathy money, there is far more that relates to choking the chicken, than gagging on food. This film would be more appropriately described as the tale of a complete ass who was raised by a crazy fugitive woman, and is more comfortable in a world of insanity than he is with normalcy or stability. But the fact that it's being described as something completely different than what it is, is a testament to how unfocused it feels.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Despite the above description, it is something of a comedy.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you mace yourself in the eye.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It won the Sundance Special Jury Award for work by an ensemble cast, which pretty much guarantees that the Independent Spirit Awards won't want to be left out of the honoring.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Sam Rockwell is one of those actors who seems about to breakout with every role, and yet... On the bright side, I'm sure that at some point he'll win a Lifetime Achievement Award for all the work he's done that's been overlooked. Anjelica Huston is a blast to watch in all her insanity. And Jonah Bobo has been one of my favorite child actors since Zathura-- although, somehow, he hasn't made a movie since then! On the other hand, Kelly Macdonald does not hold her own against these powerhouses, and her high pitched, fake American accent is grating.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Actor, and first time director, Clark Gregg, seems perfectly comfortable on the flip side of the camera. My only note, is that at one point he shows us what the main character is thinking, as if it were a black & white film reel, playing on one of his sex-partners' back. While this reel is funny and innovative, its style is inconsistent with the look of the rest of the film.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The audience is never really given a clear understanding of why these people are doing many of the crazy things they do, because the writing only scratches the surface of justification. That's why the script ends up feeling like it's just filled with crazy people doing crazy things, and without much for those of us who consider ourselves sane to latch on to, or relate to... And yes, I do consider myself sane. Deal with it!

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Young People F***ing

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Five intercut stories, about five different types of sexual relationships (the Couple, the Best Friends, the Exes, the First Date and the Roommates), as they each try to experience a night of pleasure.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Aaron Abrams, Diora Baird, Sonja Bennett, Callum Blue, Kristin Booth, Josh Cooke, Josh Dean, Ennis Esmer, Natalie Lasinska, Peter Oldring, Carly Pope

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Stop! While the concept of examining these various different types of relationships is interesting, and the structure of "Prelude, Foreplay, Sex, Interlude, Orgasm, and Afterglow" is original, the film is neither insightful nor titillating, and it won't add much to your life besides a few new mental images of bouncing breast... Hey, that might be enough for some of you.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: With a subject matter this relatable, they can't help but muster a few good laughs. By the same token, there should've been a whole lot more.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you're in a couple, the poignant reminders of how hard it is to keep your sex life interesting once you know all your partner's tricks could be saddening.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: In a sea of indy films that will never see the light of day, this one is lucky to be released at all. And the filmmakers should consider that to be the highest of honors.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: The story, having clearly been written and conceived by actors, plays like a series of scene study exercises. Thankfully, this cast is made up of the star-students from each acting class.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: For a movie that's supposed to be about Young People F***ing, there sure are a lot of talking heads! And unfortunately, I am talking about the head bone connected to the neck bone.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: If you're gonna give your film such an edgy title, you'd better have something new, clever and deeply perceptive to say about sexual relationships and how they improve and/or ruin a person's life. Otherwise, the title just seems like a marketing ploy, making your audience feel like the suckers who fell for it. I've been had.

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Burn After Reading

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: An aging gym employee (Frances McDormand) becomes obsessed with reinventing herself through a cosmetic surgery procedure she can't afford. So when her co-worker (Brad Pitt) accidentally comes across a secret CIA file, she will go to any length to get paid for returning it.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: George Clooney, Frances McDormand, Brad Pitt, John Malkovich, Tilda Swinton, Richard Jenkins, David Rasche, J.K. Simmons, Olek Krupa, Elizabeth Marvel, Dermot Mulroney

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! Finally the Coen Brothers make a movie I can get behind! (While it's clear that I'm partially trying to piss off you die-hard Coen Brothers fans, let's be honest, it has been a while since they've made a movie that can be recommended without reservations or caveats.)

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Most of the characters in this film are cold, heartless, or selfish, and in some cases all of the above. So that's funny.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but it you're offended by swearing you should know that a good 40% of the dialogue in this film consists of the singular phrase, "What the F*#k!" Oh, sorry, did I offend you there?

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It's a Coen Brothers movie, what do you think?!

Q: How is the Acting?

A: If Brad Pitt weren't already one of the biggest stars in the world, this would be his breakout performance. Because sometimes the coolest thing you can do is play a total dork. Meanwhile, John Malkovich turns in another performance that's too good for award recognition. In other words, he's so believable that you completely forget he's acting, and therefore don't give him credit for being mind-blowingly good. (See Being John Malkovich for the most pertinent example of him being too good for recognition.)

Q: How is the Directing?

A: It goes without saying that this is the area of filmmaking in which this team can do no wrong. Especially when it comes to comedies, their exaggeratedly high and low wide angles, which characterize their over-the-top style, is so engrossing that I can't figure out why more directors aren't blatantly ripping it off.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: After their last pointless movie, it's nice to see the Coen Brothers make a movie with a point. Ironically, the point may be that there is no point. But at least they make a point about it.

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Man on Wire

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: This documentary tells the story of French tightrope walker, Philippe Petit, and his attempt to do his act in between the two World Trade Center buildings.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Philippe Petit, Annie Allix, Jean-Louis Blondeau, Jean-Francois Heckel, Jim Moore, Barry Greenhouse, David Foreman, Alan Welner, and "The Australian".

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. While the daring behind this amazing feet is impressive, and the lengths to which all these people went to illegally pull it off is insane, the ending leaves you wondering what emotion the film is trying to incite.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Yeah, because performance artists are crazy!

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Beware if you have a fear of heights, some of the shots will make you queasy.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: They wouldn't want any. Because art is beautiful! And awards are ugly.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Sometimes people cry, and I don't know why...

Q: How is the Directing?

A: James March does a great job of gathering tons of authentic footage of these people in the 70s, (which is when this death-defying act occurred). But the re-enactment scenes get a little cheesy when they show the fake actor's faces, and you realize it's not the real people.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: There's something going on under the surface of this story, that for some reason is not shared with the audience. Some deep meaning, that I wish I knew... Alas, I was not there to experience it, and shall hence be forever left in the dark.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Seeing the Twin Towers in all their glory, and even watching them be built, has a tangential emotional effect, considering their now-known impending doom. This story of a young French man, whose psyche was overwhelmed by the mere idea that these two giant towers would go up and be the tallest in the world, only reinforces the deeper meaning those buildings used to have to people around the world, when they would think of America. And yet, at the same time, as his team reveals how they were able to go under cover and break into the buildings to pull off this illicit stunt, it makes you realize how vulnerable they've always been to terrorist acts.

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