Prom

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: The most uninteresting and unoriginal problems that an ensemble of teens in an imaginary high school might encounter around going to Prom.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Aimee Teegarden, Thomas McDonell, DeVaughn Nixon, Danielle Campbell, Yin Chang, Jared Kusnitz, Nolan Sotillo, Cameron Monaghan, Kylie Bunbury, Joe Adler, Janelle Ortiz, Jonathan Keltz, Nicholas Braun, Raini Rodriguez, Christine Elise McCarthy, Dean Norris, Faith Ford, Jere Burns

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Stop! This movie makes me so angry. It has cliché dialogue and storylines, no energy whatsoever, and adds absolutely nothing to the teen movie genre. The best way to describe it is completely unnecessary.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The only thing that made me laugh was the animalistic squealing of two thirteen year old girl across the row, who could hardly contain their teen angst every time the pulchritudinous Thomas McDonell strutted into frame. And when I say he strutted into frame every time, I am neither joking, nor exaggerating.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Oh, I'm crying alright! I have written three great teen comedies, all of which actually have plots-- I know, crazy-- and all of which have premises-- i.e. concepts that add something new to the teen comedy genre. My movies have been well received by Hollywood execs who have wanted to make them, but couldn't pass them up the ladder because, "Teen movies aren't making money, right now, so nobody's making them, and I have nowhere to sell this." I was really counting on this movie to bring the whole genre back into vogue. But this movie is so awful, it makes me never want to see another teen movie again. And in case you weren't paying attention, I've written 3 of them!

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Most Well Behaved Teenagers of the New Millenium. What makes this group so special? In the whole movie, I didn't see one of them talk on a cell phone, text, or tweet. And here I thought that was an impossibility... But I guess not when you have a modern day high school movie where the filmmakers forgot that it's no longer 1983.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Let me describe the depth of characters to you. There's the blond peppy girl, the tall nerdy guy, the sweet underclassmen, the jock who cheats (and looks about 35), the popular girl who's confident even when things go bad, and the guy who looks like a young Johnny Depp and drives a motorcycle because he's a bad boy. I defy anyone to find more to any of those characters than I've put down here.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Joe Nussbaum has directed both straight to video movies, and theatrical movies that nobody saw until they came out on video. His work here should continue nicely in that direction.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: I read in The Hollywood Reporter last week that Katie Wech, who wrote this movie, has already been hired to write another movie for Disney that may be a sequel to Prom. Having seen this movie, I have come to the conclusion that the "news" article I read was only given to the press to create false buzz, by pretending that Prom would be worthy of a sequel, which clearly it's not.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: Rich Ross was recently appointed the new Chairman of Disney, and this movie is the first to come out that was developed by his regime. Ever since he's become the head, no one in Hollywood seems to be able to figure out what Disney wants to be. But if this is it, I have a stock tip for you: SELL!

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: Prom Trailer

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The Twilight Saga: New Moon

(Guest Review by Kacy)

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Vampires, Werewolves and teen angst. Oh my God-- can you believe Edward actually dumps Bella?! I mean his reasons are good, but still! And then her only choice is to fall into the loving arms of Jacob-- who's a werewolf-- which is totally, like, an enemy of a vampire!

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Ashley Greene, Anna Kendrick, Jackson Rathbone, Cam Gigandet, Michael Sheen, Peter Facinelli, Rachelle Lefevre, Elizabeth Reaser, Kellan Lutz, Nikki Reed, Dakota Fanning, Chaske Spencer, Billy Burke, Jamie Campbell-Bower, Graham Greene, Edi Gathegi, Cameron Bright, Christopher Heyerdahl, Charlie Bewley, Alex Meraz, Kiowa Gordon, Christian Serratos, Gil Birmingham, Tinsel Korey, Tyson Houseman

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. If you are a teenager, definitely. Or, of course, if you are a Cougar who likes looking at young men with their shirts off. And really, who isn't?

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: In true Twilight form, most of the laughs come from the cheesy special effects.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Only if you wanted to see more of Edward because he’s hardly in this film
(nor was he in the book much).

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It's got the Teen Choice awards in the bag... but we knew that before the film even came out.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Nothing spectacular, but no one is going to worry about what's coming out of those mens' mouths, because they're too busy staring at their shirtless werewolf bods.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Better than the first film. However, in the book, Bella just heard Edward's voice in her head, whereas in the film, the director made the bad choice of showing him as a floating vision.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Fairly true to the book. But I found it frustrating that this story
portrays a weak female who gives up on life when her boyfriend breaks up
with her. And she pines over the bad boy who left her, instead of giving
the nice boy a shot. Finally there are times when the story feels like a
classic case of domestic violence. The women (Bella and Sam’s wife) are
hurt by their “monster” men, but love and stay with them despite this. If I
had a daughter, I wouldn’t be thrilled that this kind of story and
characters is one that teenagers love and value. It’s a sad statement on
our society.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/the-twilight-saga-new-moon/36045/trailers

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I Love You, Beth Cooper

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: The nerdy high school Valedictorian (Paul Rust) professes his love to the head cheerleader (Hayden Panettiere) during his commencement speech, and before he knows it, they are spending their celebratory graduation night getting to know each other.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Paul Rust, Hayden Panettiere, Jack T. Carpenter, Lauren London, Lauren Storm, Shawn Roberts, Alan Ruck, Cynthia Stevenson, Andrea Savage,

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Stop! This is the kind of movie that's only enjoyable when you accidentally catch it on cable television sometime between 2 and 4 in the morning, because it's light, cheesy, and unoriginal, and if you fall asleep watching it, you won't wake up wondering what you've missed.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Yes, but not because it's funny. More because you're uncomfortable with how bad it is.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: If you paid full price for it at the movie theater, like I did, it might. After all, we are in a recession, and money is not to be wasted.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Unfortunately, it's not quite high profile enough to be noticed by the Razzies.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Some of the worst I've seen in a professional movie since the 80s. The actors, in particular Panettiere and her supposed boyfriend, played by Shawn Roberts, glare, and they stare, and they blow the house down. And I mean: blow! You actually feel bad for Cynthia Stevenson and Alan Ruck, who are quite good in their small roles, as the parents. Paul Rust does a decent job, too, in a role that was obviously written for Michael Cera, but he is no Michael Cera, and you leave the theater wishing he had been, because Michael Cera is magic. And he would've been the only chance this movie had of coming out from under this red light.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Certainly nowhere near the best work of Chris Columbus, especially when you consider Mrs. Doubtfire, Home Alone, and discovering America.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: I spent most of the movie wondering how this script got greenlit. Was I just being bitter, because this same studio had passed on a script of mine, in the same genre, that was clearly funnier, more inventive, and better constructed? In my effort not to play the part of the ugly, angry screenwriter who's been scorned, I chose not to say anything out loud. So I was relieved and vindicated when we left the theater, and my friend, Ondrea, who is not even in show business, asked me "How can a movie like that get financed, when people like you are writing stuff that's so much better?" It was completely unsolicited. I swear to God. So I guess you really don't need over 10 years of experience in this business to know how messed up it is.

Q: Where can I see the trailer?

A: http://www.moviefone.com/movie/i-love-you-beth-cooper/32640/trailers

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