Sex and the City

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: The four girls from HBO continue to deal with love and heartache.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis, Cynthia Nixon, Jennifer Hudson, Chris Noth, Candice Bergen, David Eigenberg, Evan Handler, Jason Lewis, Mario Cantone, Willie Garson

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. At 2 hours and 20 minutes, it's like watching an entire season in one sitting, but without getting to hear nearly enough of that beautiful Sex and the City theme song which we love. Doo-doo-Doo-DOO-de-DOO-de-DOO-De-doooooo.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: The clothes.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: The clothes.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Best product placement. Did you know that there's a website called bagborroworsteal.com, where you can rent designer purses for the week?

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Samantha still has all the good lines, and Charlotte is still cute as a button, but Miranda's negativity gets a little grating, and Carrie has never been more materialistic or selfish. In most cases, that would be the fault of the script, but by now, I think we've all accepted that these are real people.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Someone should tell the director that a fashion show is not a story point. And five of them is the reason we all grow as old as these ladies, in the time it takes to watch this movie.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: True to the TV show, the dialogue is still cute, and poignant as ever. But there are moments in the plot that are hard to get past. Like the whole second act. Because if Carrie had stopped to listen to what Big was saying for just one second, she wouldn't have had any reason to be upset for the rest of the movie.

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The Promotion

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Two guys compete for the same supermarket manager job.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Seann William Scott, John C. Reilly, Jenna Fischer, Fred Armisen, Gil Bellows, Lili Taylor, Jason Bateman, Rick Gonzalez, Masi Oka

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. It's one of those small, quirky films about small, quirky people living small, quirky lives. A lot of people like that stuff.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Small, quirky laughs.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Not while you're watching it, but if these people's lives in any way resemble your own, you'll probably cry once you're safely back in the privacy of your home.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It's got a first time director with hefty writing credentials and an all-star cast-- which pretty much epitomizes the kind of movie that usually gets a Spirit Award nomination for Best First Feature.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: For Seann William Scott this is a new character. He has finally worked his way up to playing "the straight man." I actually think I prefer him in this role. For John C. Reilly, it's pretty much the same old "nice on the outside, deranged on the inside" guy we've seen him play masterfully time and time again. So to mix things up, this time he does it in Canadian.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Small and quirky.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: The desperation that each of these characters has toward getting this job, makes it hard to decide who to root for. Which is good, because it creates real tension... Oh, if only there were more than one job in North America...

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Bigger, Faster, Stronger*

*The side effects of being an American

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A documentary examining the safety and morality of steroid use, from the point of view of a director, whose brothers are both on steroids.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Chris Bell, Mark "Smelly" Bell, Mike "Mad Dog" Bell, Rosemary Bell, Sheldon Bell, and every known steroid user of the past three decades, including Barry Bonds, Mark McGuire, Jose Canseco, Sylvester Stallone, Hulk Hogan, Carl Lewis, and of course... Governor Schwarzenegger.

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! Find out why steroids are the American way.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: It's got the humorous tone of a Michael Moore doc, without nearly as much shoving of opinions down your throat.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: All I can say is, man, is our country messed up...

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: I don't see why not.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Raging... Actually, one of the surprising things about this film is that there are no instances of roid-rage, besides those that take place in a Ben Affleck movie of the week.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Wow. They used 800 clips of archival footage and all of it is placed perfectly. How did they find all this stuff?

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Focusing on the Bell family makes the story relatable and touching, while whipping off to the many different sports scandals and political scandals makes it big and important.

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The Foot Fist Way

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A Tae Kwon Do teacher with a God complex finds out that his wife has cheated on him and is forced to re-evaluate the tenants of Tae Kwon Do in ways that only a narcissist would think of.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Danny McBride, Ben Best, Jody Hill, Mary Jane Bostic, Spencer Moreno, Carlos Lopez, Collette Wolfe

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. Like an R-rated Napoleon Dynamite, some people will laugh at how they feel like they know some guy just like this tool, while others will be vexed at the simple idea that a guy this offensive could even exist.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Those of you who like this type of humor will laugh from beginning to end, while the rest of you will stare at the screen in shock and awe.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: It's aimed at a young male demographic, and everyone knows that boys don't cry.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: The film already got into Sundance, got Will Ferrell's stamp of approval, and made its filmmakers the hottest new kids in comedy, giving them the right to give the finger to their day jobs. If you ask me, at this point any further awards would just be gravy.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Danny McBride creates a character that will cause many roles to be written specifically for him from this point forward. Combining a Will Ferrell-style cluelessness with a Vince Vaughn-style mean, he's already being fast-tracked to the A-list. Ben Best is charismatic as his nemesis. And director, Jody Hill, makes interesting choices as the main character's unpredictable sidekick, who seems to have serial killer tendencies, although that's just my own personal assessment, and is in no way alluded to in the dialogue or the plot. Also look out for the only understated performance in the film, by Carlos Lopez, who hasn't done any acting before or since.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Deliberately low budget, and without any smooth transitions.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Sometimes the dialogue feels stilted, though in some cases that may be the fault of the acting. That said, the main character is distinct and consistent.

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Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: Indiana Jones returns after 20 years to prove that at age 65, he's still the James Bond of archeology.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Harrison Ford, Cate Blanchett, Shia LeBeouf, Karen Allen, Ray Winstone, John Hurt, Jim Broadbent

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. Go! Stop! Does it really matter what I say, since you're gonna go see it anyway? Still, here's a hint: the franchise has jumped the shark.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Only if you've ever brought a knife to a gun fight.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: Sometimes when I try to understand why anyone would like this silly, inconsequential and ridiculously contrived movie, I feel so out of touch that I cry into my soup.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Can they give someone an Academy Award for a score that's already been nominated and lost? Because the Indiana Jones theme song is still good.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Same as it ever was. Only now with a cane and bifocals.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Signature Spielberg... in other words, kind of old fashioned.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Do you speak Mayan? Neither do I. Unfortunately, without an expert knowledge of the ancient (dead) language, it's nearly impossible to judge whether any of it makes sense. The writers obviously realized this, and used it as an excuse not to make sense.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: If they redo the ride at Disneyland to match this film, it might finally be worth standing in line for.

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The Visitor

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: When a college professor (Richard Jenkins) returns to his apartment in New York, after an extended stay in Connecticut, he finds a couple of illegal immigrants living there, and they form an unlikely friendship.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Richard Jenkins, Haaz Sleiman, Danai Gurira, Haim Abbass, Richard Kind, Michael Cumpsty

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. This is one of those films that people will love if they bring to it the right kind of personal baggage. Those who aren't at one of those deep and pensive phases of life will find it interesting, but a little slow.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Yes, the pauses, the pacing, and the reaction shots incite sympathetic laughter.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: It probably should, but it probably won't.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: This is the kind of movie that the Independent Spirit Awards go crazy for... If only it had more famous stars.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Richard Jenkins comes off like an old pro. Haaz Sleiman has a charm and a smile that jump off the screen and into your lap. But Danai Gurira, with an undeniable beauty, and lips twice the size of Angelina Jolie's, has two moments in the film where she's supposed to cry, but isn't able to muster the necessary tears.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: The most interesting looking shots are in the B-roll, which are often shot by the Assistant Director. But considering the highly independent nature of the film, I'm going to give the director the benefit of the doubt, and assume he couldn't afford to pay anyone else to get those shots for him.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Small but original, and potentially uplifting, depending on where you're at in your personal life. Much of the character arcs take place in the subtext.

Q: Is there anything else worth mentioning about the movie?

A: The hand-made jewelry that the character called Zainab makes is hot!

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What Happens in Vegas...

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A couple of strangers (Cameron Diaz and Ashton Kutcher) drunkenly get married in Vegas, and on the verge of their annulment, one of them wins a $3 million jackpot with the other one's quarter. Now, if either of them ever wants to see a dime, they will be stuck giving this marriage a try.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Cameron Diaz, Ashton Kutcher, Rob Corddry, Lake Bell, Jason Sudeikis, Treat Williams, Michelle Kruseic, Dennis Farina, Zach Galifianakis, Queen Latifa, Krysten Ritter

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. For anyone who likes a good, cheesy, Hollywood, mostly implausible romantic comedy about two inhumanly attractive people who don't want to have sex with each other, this is the one. Wow, it sounds awful when I put it that way... But what I'm really trying to say is it's just good, clean, mindless fun.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Even if you've seen the trailer as many times as I did. The funny parts actually weren't in it.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but I was surprised to see that Ashton Kutcher was able to muster teary eyes at the appropriate moment... although it could have been eye drops. Or CGI.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: If you considered it an award to hit number one on the charts, then yes, because this movie is sure to hit number one when it comes out on DVD.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: To quote my friend Eric, who is a heterosexual male, "It's always a little weird when the guy is prettier than the girl..." To quote myself, "Hallelujah!"

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Montages keep the story moving fast and fun through the expositional parts.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: Funnier than I expected. But it definitely involves several moments of suspension of disbelief. For example, no judge has ever sentenced anyone to 6 months of hard marriage. No woman would ever take off her ex-fiancees $30,000 engagement ring without immediately trading it in for cash. And no one has ever turned down Ashton Kutcher for sex. I know you'd like to think you would, but it's just not humanly possible.

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Made of Honor

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A guy (Patrick Dempsey) finally realizes he’s in love with his best friend (Michelle Monaghan), just as she announces that she is engaged to another man

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Patrick Dempsey, Michelle Monaghan, Kevin McKidd, Kadeem Hardison, Chris Messina, Richmond Arquette, Busy Philipps, Whitney Cummings, Emily Nelson, Sidney Pollack, Kathleen Quinlan, Kevin Sussman

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Proceed with Caution. If you like romantic comedies, this is a good one. If you don't, you should grow a heart.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: Maybe not, but you will smile from beginning to end. And I'd like to take this moment to congratulate the producers for not forcing the writers or director to randomly insert characters walking into trees or being bitten by small animals for cheap laughs. It was funny once, if at all, it's never funny anymore. Stop it! Not you, Made of Honor, you did good.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: There are two good guys vying for the same girl, and one of them is not going to get her. The look on the loser's face is pretty sad.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: It's good, but it's not that good.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Anyone could've played these parts, and these are the someones who did.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Realistic and not over-the-top, which has become more and more rare in the romantic comedy world. That's a compliment.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It requires a little suspension of disbelief, especially when it comes to the scenes amongst the guys, who chat about relationships as if they were starring in Sex and the City. But even though that never happens in real life, it's still sweet to see them opening up about feelings, and helping their friend land a girl for more than just sex.

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Iron Man

(Guest Review by Russ)

Q: What’s the movie about?

A: A billionaire weapons specialist, Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) questions his life’s work after being held hostage by terrorists and creates a high-tech suit of armor, allowing him to become the iconic super-hero, Iron Man.

Q: Who’s in the movie?

A: Robert Downey Jr., Terence Howard, Jeff Bridges, Gwyneth Paltrow, Leslie Bibb, Shaun Toub, Clark Gregg, Faran Tahir, Samuel L. Jackson

Q: Is this movie worth the price of admission?

A: Go! The Marvel super-hero ‘origin story’ has been done to death, but that shouldn’t stop anyone from finding pure entertainment and fun in watching the birth of Iron Man. Filled with eye-popping visuals and a standout performance from Downey Jr., Iron Man is simply one of the best comic-book hero movies to hit theaters EVER.

Q: Will this movie make me laugh?

A: With tongue planted firmly in cheek, Downey Jr. throws off witty asides throughout that stay true to the character and will keep you chuckling.

Q: Will this movie make me cry?

A: No, but that shouldn’t be a strike against it.

Q: Will this movie be up for any awards?

A: Tech awards probably await, but the acting should not be overlooked. If Johnny Depp can be Oscar-nominated for playing a Disney pirate, why not Downey Jr. for a super hero? Yes, he’s that good.

Q: How is the Acting?

A: Where so many super hero movies give short shrift to character, Iron Man gets it right because Downey makes us actually care about this guy, and what he’s doing. Jeff Bridges is perfectly cast as the villain, and Gwyneth Paltrow plays the lovelorn assistant to absolute perfection, bringing a nice balance of current and classic heroine to the role.

Q: How is the Directing?

A: Jon Favreau’s biggest hit to date was Elf, and his comedy chops serve him well in this movie. All the action is top-notch, but the comedy and character development are given equal weight and he balances it all perfectly. One can only hope he signs on for the inevitable sequel. As much as Bryan Singer put his personal stamp on the X-Men franchise, Favreau does the same with Iron Man.

Q: How is the story/script?

A: It’s an origin story so there’s not a lot that we haven’t seen before, but at least it’s original to this particular super-hero, and for that reason alone the script is a winner. We’re (thankfully) spared scenes of Iron Man saving kittens from trees, and instead his heroics are organic to the story that’s being told. It’s a refreshing change and goes a long way toward making this movie a great start to the summer movie-going season.

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